50 Traits of a Confident Man

June 24th, 2011 by Nick Notas 9 Comments

Let’s face it, confidence is the most attractive quality in a man. For most women, a man with a strong head on his shoulders is more important than superficial factors like looks or money. I know it’s hard to believe, but it’s definitely true.

After years of working on myself, I’ve realized that there are a lot of misconceptions of what makes a confident man. Some think arrogance plays a part, some believe it’s about physical strength, and others imagine a guy who isn’t afraid to get into a fight with anyone who challenges them. In reality, none of those fit the bill.

So rather than coming up with some generic one-line answer, I decided to write a list of traits that I know confident men carry.

A confident man…

Knows to apologize when he’s wrong

Speaks the truth and doesn’t go back on his word

Isn’t worried about his girlfriend’s past dating history

Doesn’t need to put people down to make himself feel better

Gives back to others because he genuinely wants to

Is assertive and actively goes after what he wants in life

Knows how to be a gentleman and treat a woman like a lady

Takes responsibility for his actions and doesn’t blame others

Approaches a beautiful woman even when he’s nervous

Has many interests and is passionate about them

Makes the woman he’s with feel sexy and desirable

Takes the initiative to ask for her number or invite her on a date

Leads with charisma and self-assurance

Doesn’t take advantage or prey on those weaker than him

Stands up for his values and what he believes in

Has his emotions under control and keeps his cool even in the most tense situations

Embraces his sexual side and enjoys flirting

Smiles often and brightens other people’s day

Speaks slowly, clearly, and with purpose

Gets excited to meet new people and personalities

Communicates with his partner and doesn’t shut down

Expresses his feelings openly instead of making passive-aggressive comments

Isn’t afraid to disagree but doesn’t have to start an argument

Has a proactive outlook on life and radiates positive energy

Enjoys going on adventures and trying new things

Doesn’t have to brag or boast to feel important

Gives strong eye contact when talking

Avoids negative self-talk and doesn’t tear himself down

Makes the tough decisions when he has to

Is comfortable and non-judgemental about female sexuality

Sees failure as an opportunity to learn and grow from

Allows others to save face when they slip up

He respects and considers the opinions of others but doesn’t seek their approval

Tries to prevent unnecessary drama and fights in his relationship

Isn’t selfish and shares what he has with others

Creates sexual tension through physical contact and goes for the kiss

Avoids jumping to conclusions and making unwarranted assumptions

Is open-minded about new ideas and gives them a fair chance

Stands tall, with his shoulders relaxed, and head held high

Enjoys a good challenge and the process to overcome it

Isn’t jealous, controlling, or needy in his relationships

Has a great sense of humor and knows how to make people laugh

Always protects those closest to him

Expands his comfort zone on a regular basis

Is a skilled lover and knows how to give a woman incredible orgasms

Encourages others to succeed and is excited for their accomplishments

Doesn’t guilt trip or manipulate his partner to get what he wants

Is polite, has manners, and understands social etiquette

Tries to look his best because he values himself

Accepts criticism and doesn’t take things personally

Is happy with himself and doesn’t hide who he really is

So how about it, are you feeling confident?

  1. Taz @ Climb the Rainbow on June 26, 2011

    This is a great list Nick. As I was reading I was wondering if you were going to put something in about confident men protecting those they love – very happy to see it made the shortlist, since I find it an essential quality in an attractive man.

    I once went out with a boyfriend-at-the-time when another man walked past and groped me. Furious, my reaction was to turn and belt him – how DARE this despicable pig think that he had the God-given right to paw -MY BODY- like that!

    My boyfriend thought differently – he was terrified that my understandable reaction meant that he was about to get his lights punched out. The result? He became upset with ME for protecting my own body and my self-respect from that pig.

    The respect I previously held for that boyfriend flew straight out the window as soon as I realised that he was someone who I couldn’t count on. He wasn’t even man enough to protect his long-time girlfriend from being assaulted by another man.

    Needless to say, Mr. No Balls is now my ex.

  2. Greg on September 29, 2011

    You’re going to have to knock one of these off your list and add “shows gratitude”. It’s one of the most beneficial things anyone can do.

  3. Mark on July 27, 2012

    Every day of my life that I awaken I try my best to posess all these traits listed. I had most of these qualities and as humble as I try to be (humble could be on this list but I think the trait of not having to boast to look better is about the same)I lost some of these almost after dating a jealous controlling and abusive woman. It took me a while to figure out what happened. We were friends for a while and after falling in love with her I judged (not to her face) but her sexual past as I feel sex is an important bond and a woman should hold dear her body and only give it to those who earn her trust love and loyality because lets face it, women can say they enjoy being promiscuos but we all know when sex is involved feelings and emotion and love develop which can later lead to pain (a lot of men sleep around and believe the higher the number of partners the better man he is…I disagree).

    Anyway once I realized that she never had a man like me as imperfect as I am she fell for me just as hard as I had for her and she couldnt handle it. No man has ever loved her (in or out of the bedroom) like I had and she was so afraid of me hurting her that she transformed into a monster. She developed major insecurities and sabotoged our relationship with verbal and even physical abuse to the point where I was holding onto something that no longer existed so I jumped shit. I love that I came across this post because I am slowly starting to regain these traits as of today. I pray every day I can wake up and be a better man.

    Strenght and Honor!

  4. Chan on October 17, 2012

    I would love to met a Mark above. 🙂

  5. Oscar on July 30, 2013

    I see myself doing all these things and boyy – do i get tired of it all. Being that fair and balance takes a lot of energy and observation. Readers of this may know something of being ‘mindful in the present moment’ Thanks for this blog post very insightful. Please guys visit my personal page, the website is above. I live in new york

  6. richard on September 23, 2013

    he must have a profession.

  7. James on February 22, 2014

    Dating relies just a bit on confidence, but never the other way around, confidence grows from within, and if it is about dating, please stop the nonsense people, it’s understood why the writer of this article makes this kind of articles about beliefs and “tips” for dating, he makes a living out of it, but for the readers in the comment section, don’t be naive. Men are attracted by beauty, that is why the vastly majority of women are always trying to portray a pretty image and not the reality, a trait that ends up transcending to every other part of their lives, making them misleading and deceitful, while for a man, it is wealth the trait, not confidence, that is why most of us are so determined in the chase of it. Not everyone woman and man is like this, but again, the vastly majority are. You are lying to yourself if you want to believe otherwise. For a second, stop looking at the TV, magazines and the “relationship prototype” that surrounds us by the media and look at the people and reality around you instead, and you’ll see the truth.

  8. meher on July 22, 2014

    I thought the list was very well formulated. What is interesting, wouldn’t you say that the above traits of confidence are applicable to women too? (give and take a few)…

  9. Ed McMahon on January 17, 2015

    I agree with most of what you said, I just can’t deal with the “past dating history” part. Some women’s dating histories are a turn off for me. Can’t help it.


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