I knew an outgoing girl who had a lot of guy friends…or so she thought.
One day I told her, “You realize that most of these guys like you, right?”
She thought that was preposterous. She was almost offended by the idea and adamantly denied it. She said, “They’re just good friends.” When I dug a little deeper, I found out…
These “guy friends” were showing her interest left and right.
They always tried to hang out with her one-on-one. They texted and talked for hours on the phone. They bought her gifts. They bashed other guys she dated.
And they “jokingly” complimented her and got a little handsy with playful touches.
Eventually, these guys tried to make a move or confess their feelings. She had no choice but to reject them in an awkward way. Many of those connections deteriorated or fell apart altogether.
She was taken by surprise and that’s okay — she was young.
But what’s not okay is when I see this scenario play out among mature adults. The signs are obvious and it’s possible to avoid unnecessary pain.
I’ve called out guys for pretending to be a friend when they wanted more. Now I want to address the women who suspect or even know their guy friends are into them and avoid talking about it.
Women, it’s time to tell your guy friends that you see them as only friends.