Relationships, even casual ones, shouldn’t be thought of as a “game” to be won. You should be forging a real connection between two human beings.
I’ve watched too many men stumble onto dating or self-improvement advice and see it as a temporary solution. They think “Oh cool, I’m going to learn some tricks and techniques to get a woman.” They read some tips, apply them in the real world, and find a girl they like.
Then they think, “Victory! I did it. She’s hooking up with me, my work is done.”
They mistake their previous insights as a quick means to land a girl and not to become a better man. They stop trying so hard, they stop challenging themselves, and they stop growing. They get lazy — especially as time goes on.
Then it hits. The girl they felt was so into them suddenly walks away. They feel blindsided and devastated.
What They Don’t Understand Is That…
If you want to keep a quality woman, you have to become a quality man. And you have to do it for yourself, because you want to. There’s no other way around it.
Relationships require consistent effort, dedication, and self-love. That means you should:
- Lead, make decisions, and be assertive with what you want and need.
- Build your self-esteem and invest in making yourself happy.
- Maintain an engaging social life as well as a social life together. That includes seeing your friends, her friends, and other couples. You should meet new people and be a sociable person (yes, even you fellow introverts).
- Be healthy and stay in good shape.
- Walk with confidence and speak with conviction.
- Become a strong communicator and speak your mind openly. Express your feelings in healthy, constructive ways.
- Dress well and still have occasions where you both can dress up together.
- Flirt and touch often. You should turn her on and have passionate sexual moments regularly. Also, explore one another’s sexuality and give her mind-blowing orgasms.
- Create variety and don’t fall into the same routine every day. You can’t ignore her and play video games every minute of your spare time. Come up with new adventures to experience with her: go dancing, travel somewhere new (even cheap and local), ski, hit up a festival, or cook together.
- Overcome your nice guy tendencies like being jealous, controlling, clingy, needy, and desperate.
- Move up in your career and pursue your passions.
And so much more.
The reality is….
You can’t fake being a confident, attractive man — at least not for long. Your true self is always being revealed and it’s only a matter of time before women see it.
Your personal development doesn’t end once you get the girl, it only just begins. Get a head start and make the commitment now.