How to Tell If She Likes You

November 14th, 2011 by Nick Notas 9 Comments

So you’re with a girl and…

At dinner with friends, she smiles and steals French fries off your plate.

She tucks her hair behind her ear before she says hi.

She touches your arm and offers to give you a ride home.

These everyday occurrences may seem like nothing, but I assure you they speak volumes. Sometimes it’s up to us to recognize their cues because, let’s face it, girls don’t always announce their feelings for you over a loudspeaker.

Those hints are there to encourage you and give you more confidence to make a move. Are they guaranteed signals that she likes you? Definitely not, because nothing is set in stone. But, they are indicators that she damn well could be, especially if she shows many of these signs of interest.

Through Her Body Language

Our bodies say so much without us even realizing it. When a girl starts to feel those butterflies, she’ll often display her feelings subconsciously. They’re usually subtle and fleeting, but don’t underestimate what they can mean.

  • She smiles at you when you make eye contact from afar
  • She gives you open body language (turns to face you directly, arms uncrossed, warm smile)
  • She stands close or moves closer toward you
  • She touches or plays with her hair while talking to you
  • She looks down or away nervously when you hold eye contact with her
  • She primps in front of you (adjusting clothes, jewelry, makeup) to look her best
  • She brushes her body (shoulder, hand, etc) against you while standing or walking by

How She Responds

When you’re getting to know each other, it’s your job to make her feel comfortable and have her enjoy herself. If a girl is responding to you favorably, there’s a good chance she wants you to stick around. You might have to put more work into keeping things moving initially, but her warm reactions to your efforts will build her overall attraction.

  • She laughs or giggles at your jokes, even when they’re not funny
  • She re-initiates conversation during a lull
  • She agrees when you ask her to grab a drink or get some fresh air
  • She answers your questions, opens up, and tells you personal details (interests, aspirations, embarrassing stories)
  • She asks personal questions back and expresses interest in getting to know you
  • She doesn’t step away or break physical contact when you touch her
  • She stays with you even after her friends leave

What She Says and How She Acts

A girl will generally only put herself on the line when she’s interested in you. She’s going out of her way to touch and tease you because she wants to create chemistry. Remember, she speaks or acts this way because she likes you and she wants you to like her back. So please, reciprocate!

  • She touches you during conversation
  • She compliments you
  • She playfully teases you or “busts your balls”
  • She offers to buy you a drink
  • She leaves the interaction (bathroom, to get a drink, etc) and then returns to you
  • She play fights or pushes you in a joking way
  • She teases you about how you must get all the girls
  • She introduces you to her friends
  • She asks if you have a girlfriend or assumes you do in conversation
  • She asks what you’re doing later

What if you don’t get any of these signs? In my experience, that doesn’t necessarily mean she’s uninterested. We’re all different and express interest in unique ways. Even when you’re uncertain, it’s best to assume she likes you rather than not. You’ve got a lot to gain and nothing to lose from doing so.

Don’t wait around for the “green light” or “perfect moment” — create it. Use these indicators of interest to your advantage to facilitate the connection between you two. Display open body language immediately, ask her intriguing questions, and invite her along if your friends are leaving the bar.

You don’t have to memorize all these points. Keep an eye out for them, but don’t get overwhelmed. When in doubt, trust your gut and go for it 🙂

Have a free consultation with me!

  1. Sam on August 29, 2012

    great insights! This is definitely the part of dating that I have the most difficulty with, and I never really thought of these sorts of things before.

    Now that I think back on things that happened months to years ago, I realize that I had a lot of missed opportunities! Hopefully I won’t miss any more!

    • Nick Notas on August 30, 2012

      It sounds like you recognize what you’ve been missing. Being aware of your past missteps is important, as long as you don’t dwell on them.

      Now take that knowledge and apply it for the next times. Remember, there’s always more opportunities to be had!

  2. Mikkel on February 21, 2013

    Wow! Actually I didn’t know about these “signs”… They are, when told, easy to understand and actually observe how they’re used towards me or my friends! I laughed a bit because of my own experiences with these signs, most of the time I actually ignored those signs… – But the few times when I responded, I got rewarded with a date, or just a flirt for the night. Great tips man, thanks!

    • Nick Notas on February 23, 2013

      You’re welcome, glad I could open your eyes. Now next time you recognize those signs, put it to good use and make a move!

  3. Jeff on March 2, 2013

    I’ve read through your site, it has been quite helpful, especially this page. I’ve seen quite a few signs mentioned above from a girl I’ve been talking to. I kinda figured we were friends, but maybe she’s interested in more. Think I just have to work up a little courage to ask her out!

    • bob on November 18, 2013

      How did it turn out, if I may ask?

  4. Maxwell House on April 29, 2013

    All great advice, but how do you take it to the next level on a date?

  5. Jon on March 30, 2015

    I have just read this and found out the girl I’m interested in likes me back because she stares at me whilst I’m not talking she smiles when I talk to her and last week she was playing with her hair and every time she would go the bathroom or get a drink she will return to me.
    the only problem I have is that she is dating someone else

  6. Van on May 10, 2015

    Hey man, great article… I have a slight question however on what I should do about a particular person. The girl I like claimed through a friend that she sees me as a brother although we are quite close and can get quite flirty with me. She doesn’t know I have been told this, and I am not sure whether to believe it or not because in my opinion the “Brotherzone” is just a glorified version of the “friendzone” which doesn’t exist…
    Hypothetically speaking, if she does see me as a brother, do you think I should still try it on? I am quite a determined person when I want something bad enough.


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