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6 Ways To Jump-Start Your Dating Life from Seth Godin

August 5th, 2011 by Nick Notas 0 Comments

Type “Seth” into Google and he’s the first result, even beating out Wikipedia. I’m talking about Seth Godin, the eleven-time best selling author with a brilliant mind and a sharp tongue. If you’ve read some of my earlier posts, you may have already realized my deep admiration for his work.

When I first discovered Seth’s blog, I didn’t really “get it.” The site was comprised of mostly short posts with some blogger ranting about marketing and self-improvement — another one of those guys. It was only until I kept arriving at his page from other sources that I started to appreciate and understand his ideas. Since then, I get excited to read his daily updates which are always full of innovative advice and sometimes make me think he can read my mind.

That’s why I decided to pay a tribute to Seth and all he’s taught me by sharing some of his wisdom with you guys.

“Interesting and interested…it helps to be both. These are the two ways you earn attention. If it’s so obvious, why is it so difficult?”

Guys often ask me “How am I supposed to be interesting?” I wish just once I’d get “How can I listen to her better?” When you’re invested in the conversation you will relate and respond better, thereby naturally being more interesting. Be curious about women: want to get to know who they are and what they’re about, rather than just focusing on how you can look the coolest.

“If you need to conceal your true nature to get in the door, understand that you’ll probably have to conceal your true nature to keep that job.”

Hands-down the most significant realization I’ve made in dating is to just be genuine. When you pretend to be anything else, it’s more headaches than it’s worth. You’re never comfortable in your own skin, you put up walls, she likes you for someone you’re not, and you’re stuck in an endless cycle. Be honest: you’ll find women who want to be with the real you.

“The secret to being wrong isn’t to avoid being wrong! The secret is being willing to be wrong. The secret is realizing that wrong isn’t fatal.”

Relish in your failures. Embrace the ups and downs of dating — some interactions are going to suck while others will be amazing. But those tough situations aren’t useless, far from it. They are often the ones that teach you the most and make you the strongest. I’ve failed more times than I can count and it’s never as bad as you imagine it to be.

“You don’t have enough time to be unhappy and mediocre. It’s not just pointless, it’s painful.”

Find whatever makes you happy and do it. Stop wasting time and follow your dreams: not next week, not tomorrow, now. If that’s climbing a mountain, gear up. If that’s getting good grades to get into med school, study hard. Want an incredible girlfriend you truly connect with? Don’t sit around, go out and find her! It takes more energy to continually half-ass something than to just do it right and get it over with. Be outstanding and nothing less.

“Being a leader gives you charisma. If you look and study the leaders who have succeeded, that’s where charisma comes from, from the leading.”

A leader is irresistible (especially to women.) Having the guts to stand up and take charge inspires and impresses people. Don’t think you need some special gift to be a great leader; the gift is something you acquire along the way. Women want, trust, and respect a man who is confident in his abilities. Check out this list to get a better idea.

“If you are deliberately trying to create a future that feels safe, you will willfully ignore the future that is likely.”

You’ve got to take chances. Defy all the excuses in your head and approach that cute girl at Starbucks! If you don’t talk to her, you’re preventing anything extraordinary from happening. To become your best self, you have to challenge your comfort zone regularly. The future of your love life is unpredictable, so stop trying to be in control all the time and just enjoy the ride.