8 Basic Rules For Texting a Girl You Like

April 18th, 2011 by Nick Notas 172 Comments

Note: There is a much updated and expanded version of this on my free eBook “The Gentleman’s Guide to Texting Women”.

Like it or not, texting is here to stay. As part of the dating process, you’re responsible for keeping in touch with her and making things interesting. Thankfully, this works in your favor.

Texting allows you to come up with witty and enticing responses from a comfortable location. It’s easy enough to master and with some basic guidelines, you should be a pro in no time. Here are some simple points to remember when texting a girl you’re interested in.

Avoid improper grammar

Well-written text messages make you look mature and intelligent. Sloppiness is not only a turn-off but also a potential deal breaker. Some shortcuts like “np at all” are okay but “kk can’t wait 2 c u 2nite” is excessive. Double-check your spelling, grammar, and auto correct before you press send.

Use emoticons wisely

A smile or wink is great for adding emphasis or being flirtatious. However, using them in every other sentence can be overkill and distracting from what you’re trying to say. Sticking to no more than one emoticon per message is usually a good idea.

Don’t flood her with texts

Replying with three texts for every one she sends shows you’re too eager and too invested. You shouldn’t over-think it but go easy and feel out the pace of the conversation. If she takes an hour to respond, just give it a few minutes before messaging her back.

Text at reasonable times

Unless she’s working the graveyard shift, texting her randomly at four in the morning won’t look good. I’m positive whatever you have to say can wait until the next day. Also, if you’ve had a heavy night of drinking, be cautious of what you’re writing.

Use more statements

How do you talk with your friends? You probably shoot the shit and ask the occasional question. Use this as a reference point for your natural style and add a dash of spice when talking to her. Bombarding her with questions will make it feel like an interrogation.

Keep things light

A girl loves to see her phone buzz and read a text from you that’s cute, intriguing, and makes her laugh. Don’t get too personal over text – it isn’t worth it and should be saved for in-person or phone conversations. Tell her about your funny train ride home and not your life story.

Start flirting with her

Short, sweet, and your opportunity to shine, flirtatious texts are a great way to generate sparks. Trust and comfort have to build over time, but light and teasing messages will keep her on her toes until then. Make fun of her for watching Dancing With the Stars or even playfully accuse her of seducing you.

Set up a date

Texting is a low-pressure way to setup a date. When she’s responding well, suggest an activity that you can do together. Try something like, “Hey I’m going to X on Thursday, you should come along – it’ll be awesome :)” It’s casual and she’s more likely to say yes.

Now that you’ve read my ideas, I’d love to see some of yours. What are some texting tips that have worked for you?

Need some advice? I don’t want you to feel like you have to do this alone. If you’d like a step-by-step, tailored approach to magnetically attract women and build more meaningful relationships, let’s have a free, 100% confidential consultation call (up to 30 minutes) to discuss how we can work together.  Schedule your free strategy session here.

  1. Need help! on July 30, 2012

    Dear Nick,
    There’s this girl I like and just met her. She was only in town for the weekend and we hung out on Friday. I stupidly assumed she was leaving early on Sunday morning and sent her a text at about 8am. She didn’t seem upset about it and we did manage to have a nice back-and-forth later in the afternoon where I found out she was actually leaving early Monday morning. I jokingly told her I would “harass” her before she left (aka wish her a safe drive back home). Is there anyway I can try to apologize for texting her so early the first time? Should I still text her Monday morning like I said I would? Help! I’m still trying to get better at boldly flirting with girls. By the way, thank you for your awesome articles and tips!

    • Nick Notas on July 30, 2012

      No need to apologize for texting early. You wanted to talk to her and you did, nothing wrong with that. Plus, she responded positively so it sounds like she wanted to hear from you, too.

      You can definitely text on Monday, why not? My main advice would be to stop texting simply to chat. Instead, start texting to get girls out. If she was staying until Monday, I would’ve pushed to see her when you were chatting on Sunday morning.

      You’re very welcome!

      • John on March 18, 2017

        Long story some dub met a girl when I was 17 and from the moment we met we always had a thing and we’re always hook up and flirt and all types of things anytime we were around each other. We’ve actually slept together Before, well as time went on we got older I join the army and left for four years she got pregnant by a guy and the guy ended up leaving unbeknownst to me. I have been looking for this person for Long time trying to find her but couldn’t because the ex-boyfriend had blocked a lot of people from her life on social media and so forth, Anyway he left and she single and alone and just recently after not talking to her for close to four years due to the fact that he blocked me from her, she contacted me first and we’ve been talking since for the most part, but this is where the trouble starts I can’t tell if this is like a O hey you’re a friend of mine that I haven’t talk to let’s get together and reminisce type thing, or if it’s a beginning to a possible relationship, I pretty much don’t know how she feels. but I have some sense she single has known me for 10 years and has always had a thing for me as I have had a thing for her also that maybe she reached out to me with the same hopes that I have? I don’t know anyway she’s been busy and hasn’t been texting back which isn’t that big a deal because I do realize she’s been extremely busy and I know that for a fact. But how often should I text her? And is it best, Mike really is it a good idea for men to just kind of blow off the woman to get her to talk to him I’ve heard that from many people and on a few times with success somewhat

  2. young on January 16, 2013


    Been talking to this girl for about a month who got out of a bad relationship not too long ago. we hung out all break. she told me she likes me but wants to take it real slow because she does not want to make the same mistake. texting has been fine. we text everyday. at first it started off her calling me and texting me first everyday. I recently moved back to my apt. which is an hour away and we both are busy with school. texting has been a tad bit slower or later. recently she called me telling me that she is going to hang out with an old guy friend she has not seen forever and get a drink or two but not get drunk. i told her to call me on her way home to make sure she is safe and she said she will.. that night. she drunk texted me hello. i said whats up and hope she gets home safe.. she responded “i’m no” and i sent her a text “umm ok well i hope you’ll be taken care of tonight.sent her another text “you probably won’t remember but where every ur statin at just let me know you got there”. she did not text me for a half hour and my apt. has awful service and there has been a issue once where calls didn’t go through. so i sent her another text telling her about the bad service in my room and told her to be safe and apologize if i’m sounding like a dad, just want to make sure she gets home safe. She has not texted me back the next day which is today for me. is she losing interest? was I doing too much there.

    • Nick Notas on January 17, 2013

      There isn’t much to go off here but why are you acting like her father or friend? Being timid, texting for weeks or months with no plans, giving her advice with another guy she’s getting drunk with, and repeatedly texting her is not attractive. Telling her “I hope you’re taken care of” by another man is needy. She’s not going to feel romantic or sexual with you acting like that.

      You should have been playfully flirting and trying to get her out ASAP. If you read my updated texting guide, the #1 rule of texting is to setup plans — that’s it. Girls get bored and frustrated if you talk for extended periods of time without moving forward.

      I would send her a message in a day or so being forward about hanging out. If she doesn’t make time or plans for you, move on to the next girl. Take it as a learning experience and start being more forward and assertive with women.

  3. A.L jamir on January 28, 2013

    Hey i read your tips and thought of asking some help from you.
    Here is a girl i meet in college its been some months knowing her.
    Before i was told by her friends that she likes me and now i too like her but she seem not much interested in me this days. Please help what i should do.

    • Nick Notas on January 29, 2013

      Have you asked her to hang with you yet? Invite her out and be forward with your intentions. If she likes you, she’ll reciprocate those feelings. If she doesn’t, she won’t come out or she’ll tell you how she feels when you make a move. Action always gets you the truth.

  4. Don on February 8, 2013

    was hoping for your advice on this 1. I can sometimes get numbers okay when I go out, but the follow up is terrible. If you just meet a girl at a bar how long do you wait to call her and what are some good examples of a first text? Or do you skip the texting and go straight for the call?I saw you said use the text as a tool to get her out not to chat… about how many texts into the convo,or what milestone to reach before you start trying to arrange a meeting?

    • Nick Notas on February 8, 2013

      I cover timeframes and supply examples in my texting guide. I always text within 24 hours of getting her number. If I’m interested, I’m not going to dance around my intentions. Just tell her you had a good time meeting her or reference something funny from your conversation.

      Texting or calling is up to you and how you feel comfortable. I like to call because I feel comfortable on the phone and can really build a connection. Other guys do extremely well with only texting and getting girls on dates. It’s personal preference.

      Again, there’s no set number but within 3-5 texts back and forth I suggest a meeting. My time is valuable and I want to find out if she’s interested sooner than later.

      Hope that helps!

  5. Ashton on February 20, 2013

    Hi nick, i got to know this girl when i was in my previous company and while i was interested in knowing more about her, i was about to quit and she was taking over my duties so i did not feel it was appropriate and i left it at that.

    But a few months after i left, i started Texting her and we started to chat more and more. Her response has been pretty ok (most of the time she only takes a few minutes to reply and the replies are quite long), she asks a lot of questions about me (my likes and dislikes) and seems generally interested to keep the conversation going. She has also initiated conversations a few times.

    From what i observed while i was still in the company, she does not appear to be such a friendly person in public.

    So after a few weeks of chatting and after she ask me about what type of movies i liked and me asking her back(she said she is ok with any type of movie), i decided to ask her out for a movie.

    To be honest i was quite hopeful but to my surprise she said it was not a movie she is interested in watching and when i suggested another movie, she said she was busy with work and could not spare time to come out.

    Although i do know that she is a bit of a workaholic ( eg. working at home on holidays), i am still skeptical on whether it is her subtle way to telling me that she is just trying to be friends and want me to leave it at that.

    So is she playing hard to get or just not interested at taking another step forward?

    • Jon on February 23, 2013

      Not interested, bro. I’m. Sorry, but no girl says no when you ask them out to play hard to get. This may be hard, but the only thing you can do is move on and find another girl.

  6. Bailey on February 27, 2013

    Hey, I met this girl at the shops about a week ago, I think she was teasing me and my mate there because they were talking about ‘G Stings’ loudly, knowing we were there, I already knew her friend, Grace and that night I asked grace for her friends number she said that one of her friends didn’t mind if I had it, so she gave it to me. After she asked me which one i was she said ‘oh the hot one’ . I’ve talked to her a few times at school and we text a bit, but I don’t know if she is interested, she sends me a few winky faces etc thanks

    • Nick Notas on March 17, 2013

      Push it forward. If you want to see if a girl is interested, ask her to hang out rather than endlessly texting. Next time she responds invite her to do something, “I’m grabbing a drink/coffee/going to museum/whatever on Wednesday, come join me.”

      If she’s interested, she’ll say yes or make plans for a better time. If she’s not, she’ll turn down the offer.

  7. Emily on February 27, 2013

    Hey Nick,
    So I’m obviously a female but I could still use your help. I have a great boyfriend, and we never run out of things to talk about during face-to-face conversations or phone conversations. But sadly, texting is another story. I’ll text him a paragraph and he’ll respond with ‘k’ or I’ll ask him a question and he’ll give me a one word answer. I don’t know how to politely tell him that he’s crap at texting or simply make him respond better.
    Of course, I do take into consideration that he might be busy sometimes or that he may not want to talk but to do this all the time simply makes things awkward. I don’t know what to do so when I came across your website for helping guys date

    • Nick Notas on March 17, 2013

      The first step is to communicate openly about this with him. Sit him down and calmly express what you’re feeling. Give him a chance to explain his side of things.

      He may not know that it’s bothering you or an issue and will gladly work on it. I also know some men who just absolutely hate texting and it has nothing to do with the other party. Either way, give him the benefit of the doubt and talk it through.

      • johnny be good on December 15, 2014

        Personally I think he’s not into texting, like me! it’s so in personal, what happen to the old days , phones and sex, what’s up with this sexting business

  8. Brian on March 1, 2013

    Hey nick, a girl that texts me every single day, it used to be even on who starts the conversations, but now I find it that I’m starting most of them, but she still starts a couple. We live far away and only get to see each other on weekends because of a youth group, and she’s extremely shy if that helps; I’ve asked her to Skype multiple times but she claimed she was too busy. She used to say bye, or goodnight, but now she just stops texting. Any idea how I can get her to not randomly stop texting? Thanks

    • Nick Notas on March 17, 2013

      You’re texting too much and not having enough action. Girls will only stay interested for a while before they get frustrated or bored. She doesn’t want to keep texting you for days on end. She wants to hang out, see where it’s going, and have a real connection.

      Next time you hang out, start flirting with her. Be playful, tease her, get a little physical, and create some romantic attraction. Invite her in person to do something together, either after youth group or on a different day.

      Overall, less texting and more pushing forward when you’re together in person.

  9. Franklin on March 2, 2013

    I told myself I would never date a girl from my hs when i got to college, so most of them i haven’t shown much interest in, even if they where the knockout of the school. But a girl from my hs has came back up on my radar. So basically i am attempting to ask you how do i spark conversation w/ this girl, and rise up out of the “friend zone?”

    • Nick Notas on March 17, 2013

      Are you even in the friend zone with her? You might not be if you just started talking.

      Treat her like a girl you’re interested in, not as a friend. Don’t just message her endlessly or hang out without trying to push things forward. Women want a man who can lead and go after what he wants in life. Flirt with her often, don’t be afraid to touch her, and get her to chill one-on-one. Escalate it until you go for a kiss.

      Also, read the Flirting and Sexual sections on my Dating 101 page.

  10. josue on March 3, 2013

    There’s this girl I’m talking to I walk he to class everday carry her bag nd open the door for her what else should I do? I texted her but we only sent 11 txt messages I’m not good with conversatins what should I do?

    • Nick Notas on March 17, 2013

      Invite her to hang out with you one-on-one. Flirt, get physical, escalate. Read my similar responses above.

  11. will on March 6, 2013

    Hey I just asked a girl to junior prom. she said that she would think about it. she texted me that night to talk but still didn’t give me an answer. She still said she was thinking about it in school today. Should I text her or what should I do? Any advice would be a help.

    • Nick Notas on March 17, 2013

      Don’t do anything right now. If she’s interested, she’ll say yes and let you know. Instead, start talking to other girls and expand your options. Don’t just focus on her.

  12. kray on March 9, 2013

    Hey Nick
    There is this girl who I have know for three years. I started to text her a week ago. We started to text each other since then almost everyday, she keeps texting me everyday . She wanting to know about my personal life, like she asks am I single ?, who I have crush on etc. She keeps using these emoticons and wants to know what I did everyday
    Is she in love with me ?

  13. Kevin on March 16, 2013

    I’ve talked to this girl a few times, but not so much last year, in a class we had together. Just recently I grew some balls and asked her on a coffee date. She didn’t hesitate and answered right away with Yeah. I mean my approach was awkwardly cute and subtle. People have told me that about it as a positive thing with the two things in her mind: 1. She found me cute and decided to give me a chance; 2. She’s thought about it before.
    What I’ve noticed the only person from our class last year that she would even remotely say hi to would be me. So It leaves me with questions. I texted her the following day after getting her number. It went all right. I may have talked a bit about myself a tad, but not a lot. I showed interest in her. Today I texted her (friday) because she was feeling nervous about a test the previous day. I told her to not stress it and hope she passed. Showing her that I care. She then told me, when I asked “so what you up to,” that she was shopping with some friends. I said sounded fun and then I said goodbye because I didn’t want to keep her from her friends. I was being polite. I didn’t know if it was the right thing or not.
    I want to text her on monday to show less importance in her. Make her seem like I care but not to the max. My friends say I should wait till I see her again to talk to her. But then again since we don’t have class together this semester It’s hard to see her. I see her at times but those are rare. When I do I say hi or whatever. We have class at the same time on the same floor sometimes but don’t know if I should try to coincidentally bump into her or not. It depends. I’m not a great texter so I’m conflicted.

    How should I approach the situation?

    • Nick Notas on March 17, 2013

      You asked her out on a date and she said yes with excitement. Then you proceeded to text her about other things multiple times. See the problem here?

      Your first texts should have been setting up the date. She already agreed to hanging out, why backpedal?

      I’d text her now, get a response, and then say something like, “So how about that coffee tomorrow?”

      • Kevin on March 18, 2013

        That’s what I did prior when I got her number. I asked about it but she was heading to jersey. Now the problem is I was told to
        Stop texting her and to talk to her in person instead. My friend kept telling to just text her and figure something out. But as of now I’m gonna ask for that coffee on Monday or Tuesday before spring break.

  14. John on March 16, 2013

    Hey Nick, very interesting and informative article, but I’m having a dew issues myself.

    I’ve known my crush for 2,5 years now. We first met in France during the summer. We flirted a lot back then and ended up making out and holding hands one night at a party. Last summer was pretty much the same, but this time no kissing or holding hands, because we were both in relationships. However I did lay my head on her stomach as she ran her fingers through my hair.

    Any enough about the things we do in person. When it comes to Facebook messaging it’s slightly different. About 3 months ago when we started message she seemed to be enjoying it. Then it jumped to the “I miss you so much”, “I really like you”, “i wish you were here with me” parts. She sent me a few messages confessing she has feelings for me, and so have I. The last message she sent me that made my heart jolt was “[…] I want to simplify this because I care for you and want to see you.” Simplify what? you may ask … She lives in Paris and I live in London, it’s about long distance.

    So what can you judge from this? Is there any chance of us being together? Is she even still interested? What should I be texting her? and how often?

    • Nick Notas on March 17, 2013

      I can’t judge anything absolute, you’ll have to figure that out. But, it sounds like she is definitely interested in you and wanted to create something more. Maybe get off Facebook and move it to a real phone or Skype conversation. Then…

      I would be forward with her. “I like you too, so what should we do about it?” See what she says. She’s likely either looking for a long-distance relationship or for one of you to move closer. It depends on what you want as well and if either of those are viable options for you.

  15. Ciaran James on March 23, 2013

    hey man, just a question. I met a cutie at the gym and was able to grab her number off her. I texted her later, and we had a good convo all day, we were both flirtatious and informative, I was asking questions, and she was too. but we fell asleep I guess around 3. the only thing is, is that the next day, I text her saying “hey, how’s it going?:)” and she hasn’t replied a day later. so im kind of confused. it seemed to be going pretty good, and I was about to set up the convo that day for meeting up. we are both about 18-19. she also takes a while to reply sometimes making me thing she does It intentionally. Could you let me know what it most likely means, and where I should do next?


  16. Daniel on March 24, 2013

    Hey Nick
    So there’s this girl I’ve been textin for about a month or a month in a half and I’ve grown to like her. She has told me that she likes me but she just had a boyfriend cheat on her and a family member get cancer. When we text she starts actin confused or not interested in talkin. I wanna ask her out but idk if I should or if its the right time.
    Plz help

    • Nick Notas on March 30, 2013

      Hey Daniel,

      Those things very well could have happened to her or they could be excuses for her not wanting to hang out. I would assume she’s being honest with you.

      That said, the only way to find out is to push for a one-on-one. Take the shot and see how she responds. If she’s interested, you’ll meet up and if she’s not, you won’t. Keep it simple!

  17. John on April 2, 2013


    I met a girl about a month and a half ago and we talk a little while at the bar during our first encounter(because she had a bf at that time). Last week I ran into her again at the bar. At first I just saw her across the bar and she winked at me and I winked back and didn’t think anything of it. Then, she came up to me and we talked for about an hour straight about how she is single now and how she thinks I’m really cute and i dress very well, so I took the initiative to get her number. I texted her not the next day but the day after that, and we talked for a good half of the day but then she stopped texting in the middle of the conversation. So I didn’t text back and waited and waited then finally 3 days later she texted me say “hey what are you up to tonight” after not having talked for 3 days and not reasoning to my text that one day, kinda like nothing happened ha Idk if I should not respond and wait for her to text me again or just cave in and respond. I’m not good at the whole hard to get thing haha is this just her playing hard to get or what do you think.


    • Nick Notas on April 4, 2013

      She’s clearly interested. She winked at you, came over to hit on you, and texted you to hang out. Don’t wait or play games or you’ll lose your chance — invite her out already!

  18. Adam on April 9, 2013


    Hoping for a little help here. I keep having a problem it seems with girls. I can talk to them, meet them online, get them to go out with me a time or two, but then its like they just lose interest? I am 26 yo and havent had a girlfriend yet, so maybe that is subconciously affecting me? Anyway any tips?
    It seems that after 3 dates or so with the same girl I run out of things to talk about? Any advice you could give would be appreciated….Thanks in advance!!

    • Nick Notas on April 11, 2013

      Hey Adam,

      If you’re meeting girls online, having multiple dates, and then they lose interest — you’re probably not creating a strong enough sexual connection. Are you pushing things forward and escalating the situation? Are you having physical contact? Have you gone for a kiss?

  19. mental on April 10, 2013

    Hi nick

    a girl and me where messaging when I asked her how she was.she said she was.good in capitals-she then said just keep and that was it-does this mean somethimgi?

    • Nick Notas on April 15, 2013

      Not sure, one word is pretty vague to go off. Why not ask her out and see if she wants to invest time in you?

  20. d on April 11, 2013

    Hey nick
    I really like this one girl I met in class. We hit it off and I got her to laugh the whole time. But the thing about me is I’m never tounge tied when talking to girls but when I text I often have no clue what to say or how to answer he questions or statments without sounding like im just giving here the average mumbo jumbo. Please help me

    • Nick Notas on April 15, 2013

      It sounds like she enjoys your company, just invite her out already. Too many guys try to come up with cool texts when you should be pushing forward to hang out. If she’s interested, she’ll say yes.

  21. jsmes on April 13, 2013

    Hi Nick, there was this fellow intern i’ve always wanted to get to know better but we had too little time before she had to leave. So now we’re just acquaintances and i have no idea what reason i can use to strike a text conversation with her. I didnt get to talk to her that much and i,m afraid that it’ll be weird that i try to talk to her now. What can i do?

    • Nick Notas on April 15, 2013

      You don’t need a reason to text her, just text her. “What’s up, how’s things been?”

      Get a response, message her back a couple times, and invite her out. “We should catch up, come grab a drink with me Thursday.” If you don’t do drinks, suggest anything else that interests you or take an idea from here:

  22. Justin on April 15, 2013

    great artice on texting! It think its a good ideas to keep your texts short but at the same time whitty and compelling…also you don’t want to be responding to all of her messages, it’s good to get her thinking why you haven’t responded to her messages, as she wil be wondering what you are doing and when you will text her again. Mystery is an attractive quality!:)

    • Nick Notas on April 17, 2013

      Agreed that witty and compelling are nice to haves — but not absolutes. When a guy is inexperienced, it’s often best to keep it simple and push to meet in person. If she was interested when you met, she’s going to want to hang out.

      As for not purposely responding to her messages, I disagree. There are plenty of ways you can show value (humor, pushing for a date, flirting, lifestyle) without needing to play games. The exception is when you’re ending a discussion, you don’t necessarily need to reply from your side.

  23. William on April 16, 2013

    Hello Nick, I’ve a question and I hope you can help me out.
    I met this girl last week and we’ve been texting each other every day since. So two days ago, I asked her on a date and we’re meeting each other on Friday. At least, I hope she doesn’t flake. My question is, do I need to keep in touch with her and if so, what’s the best way to keep her interested without being too cheesy (or pushy, or anything else)?

    • Nick Notas on April 17, 2013

      I always recommend messaging the day before the date or early the day of. This way you know if she’s still meeting up. You can…

      Text her like you normally have been. After a couple messages, finish with something like “Excited for tomorrow, see you then.” She’ll respond positively or let you know it’s not on.

      Or you can message playfully like, “Hope the anticipation for our awesome adventure isn’t killing you yet =P” A little bit of purposeful cheesiness is good.

  24. Blue on April 18, 2013

    Hey nick, I recently met this girl while I was visiting a friend of mine at his college. Everything went extremely well. She grabbed my hand, laughed at my jokes, we engaged in really interesting conversation and she was displaying multiple signs of affection. At the end of the night she kissed me on the cheek, gave me a hug and her number. Now we both attend different colleges that are pretty far apart, so seeing this girl within the next few weeks is pretty much impossible. My first question is, should I read into the kiss any further by asking her if there were any implications attached to it. My second question is should I be attempting to generate interest over the long period of time during which we won’t be physically seeing each other and if so, what is the best way of doing that?

    Thank you

  25. AnonymousT on April 20, 2013

    Hello Nick,

    About a week ago at my college orientation, I met a girl for the very first time who is starting in the fall just like me and goes to a high school about 20 minutes from me. We are both going out of state. Now, I met her at one of the sessions, and the next day I got to speak with her again and her parents for about 15 minutes before signing out. The next evening once I had returned home, I messaged her on Facebook. We talked for about an hour and a half and I told her to text me sometime and gave her my number. She responded with an Alrighty! Talk to you later. The conversation went really well and I had thought I was getting somewhere. Well, it has been a few days later and no text and I had even tried to message her back two days later after we had talked with a, Hey! How’s it goin? and received no response. I am really starting to like her and would like to get to know her before we head down. I am afraid to message back because I am afraid I would be bothering her and I don’t want to screw anything up. Would you suggest I try to take this slowly or try to go right after her? I was even thinking about possibly asking her to a ball game or a movie, but like I said I feel like I am rushing it. Please if you have any advice, it would be really helpful.

    Thank you for your time.

  26. Captain on April 21, 2013

    Hi Nick,
    I went away for this residential week away and met this girl. Ever since I returned home I have texted her everyday and arranged to meet up for a meal. I thought we had a great day and everything went fine. She texted me at first a little bit but hasn’t texted me since. What the problem?


  27. Help on April 22, 2013

    Hey I lm in a pickle I was hanging out with this girl we hooked up a couple times but we never got serious, I went away to school and dated another girl who we broke up about a year ago now I’m talking to the first girl again and I’m getting interested in her again but she sends me mix signals via text saying that she wants to hang out with me but when the opportunity happens somthing gets in the way either with me or her. We flirt sometimes when we text. Is she just being nice or does it seem like she wants somthing more

  28. The nice guy on April 24, 2013

    Hey Nick, man I just love these tips you’re so awesome man!
    Hey I need some help with this, well basically I’m 17 nnd the girl is 16 and while I was at an event I met this girl just perfect ^-^ we’ve been tlking for 7-8 daya now and we have almost everything in common! She told me to call her Di instead of Diana, she told me about her problems and I cheered her up! 🙂
    Would their be any tips you’d give me for example to make our bond stronger or anything? Thanks a lot 😀

  29. amr on April 27, 2013

    dear nick
    How are you? 🙂
    I told the girl that i like that i trully love her, but she said that this is not the right time to get closer because of the high school exams, and these emotions should be at the university, so, should i wait for her or what?
    And also she seems to avoid me at school, and she tries not to look at me, but i saw her looking at me before and i smiled to her, but when i text her, she seems to be very enthusiastic about the text, and she answers in full details, but when it comes to the real conversations, i am afraid to talk to her to tell me something that i don’t want to hear, so wat should i do, should i text her every day?
    Or ahould i try to talk to her personally
    Thank you nick 🙂

  30. John on May 8, 2013

    Hey Nick,
    So I met a girl who works at a local spot of mine, spoke a few times and got her number. I texted her and asked her out a couple days later and got the busy response. It was quick and short. I asked, she said busy, and then I ok next time (3 total texts, 1 from her). How long should wait to ask again, or should just move on? We haven’t had any other communication since, about 4 days.

  31. Robb on May 8, 2013


    I just met a girl and I’m really interested. We exchanged numbers and have been texting for the last couple of days, should I keep texting or should I try to set up a date/try to meet her? Don’t want to seem to eager, and if I keep texting what should I talk about?

  32. Smith on May 9, 2013

    Hey, it has been 4 days that we had a great chat on facebook, and eventually she gave her number to me. We started texting each other, and she seemed to be enjoying the convo that lasted for the next 2 days, but since then she hasnt shown warmth at all. Each time i initiated, but without a good response, and sometimes she replies after an hour or two. I am really interested in her and want to hang out with her. What should i do now? Should i avoid her for a while, and wait for her to take the next step, or keep on texting? I dont want to make a mess.

  33. Tyler on May 14, 2013

    Hey nick,
    There’s this girl that’s on my track team she’s always flirting with me and she’s always cuddling up on me before and after practice.
    She gave me her number today, I don’t want to mess this up because I’ve got feelings for her so I need you advice for what I should text her because I’m a horrible texter

  34. Matty on May 24, 2013


    I’ve been taking to this girl for about 2 weeks now, we went on a date that went well (ended with a kiss) and she seemed enthusiastic when I brought up a second date idea to ice skate.

    She’s been busy lately at work but still acknowledges wanting to go on the second date but not until next week. Totally cool by my me, trying to keep the pace comfortable for both of us.

    We’re both going to be in Atlantic City this weekend and staying at the same hotel; this was a total coincidence. I casually brought up the idea of us meeting up in Atlantic City; she didn’t flat out say no but also didn’t jump on board right away. Should I not contact at all while down there and just focus on the second date? FYI, there’s definitely chemistry between us but she said it’s been some time since she’s dated. Any feedback would be much appreciated!

  35. Adrian on May 25, 2013

    I’m in high school and I’ve known this girl for a few years now and we’ve been texting TONS for a few months. For some reason, she seems much less eager to text with me lately but still flirts tons in person. Not long ago, I started getting feelings for her. We just recently hung out for the first time at the movies and I was making her laugh a lot and everything seemed to go great. That was last week and just today when I was talking to her she brought up how she wanted to go see another movie with me but later today I texted her about it and she was giving me very late, short responses. Why is she doing this and how should I respond when she texts like that (without sounding desperate) because it seems to be happening more and more often?
    Thanks, Adrian

  36. Just me on May 28, 2013

    Dear nick,
    please there is this girl I met for d first time and I requested for her facebook username of which I added her. But now that I’ ve known her name,what should be the next step or rather tell me what to say next?

  37. tarif porte de garage enroulable on May 28, 2013

    Hurrah, that’s what I was looking for, what a information! existing here at this weblog, thanks admin of this website.

  38. brady on May 30, 2013

    I need some help with whether I know if some girl likes me or not. I’ve been talking to her for a few years now and I really like her, but I’m afraid if I ask her out that she might not like me that way and I could be to far in the “friend-zone” then things would get a little awkward too. We text about everyday for hours and set up things we should do but its hard because she lives 2 hours away but I just got my car so it should be a little easier now. But how do I know if she likes me that way over text? She constantly sends smiley/winky faces and joke around a lot but I’m just terrible at telling if someone likes me or if were just good friends. Do you have any advice for me?

  39. nate on May 30, 2013

    Hey nick, I came across your article looking for advice. So I went and
    met this girl I’ve been texting with for a couple of days. I don’t think the date went awesome but it seemed good. So when I was driving home she texts me “it was really good meeting you. We gotta take a road trip to nowhere” and then I text back “sounds good to me. It was nice meeting you too, look forward to seeing you again soon.” And she just sends a smilie emoticon back. (Keep in mind I was telling her how I liked to just drive around, with no destination). My question being, what does she mean, is it good, and did I screw up with a lame text? Thanks in advance.

  40. Zane on May 31, 2013

    Hey nick, i have a question and hope you could help me out.
    So there’s a girl, one of the most popular girl in the school. I’m not that unpopular but way more unpopular than her. A month ago i tried to text her and she nicely answer me. But, for god’s sake, she always (when i said always i mean ALWAYS) took 3 to 4 hours to reply me. And the other problem is i can’t really think about what to text because i really am afraid that she would be bored by me or stuff. So my question is why is the girl taking that long for answering me? Is it a sign of rejection or something? And the other thing how to make the conversation way “funner”? Thanks and sorry for little bad english

  41. David Lucas on May 31, 2013

    Hey nick
    Basically Iv been talking to this girl for quite sometime now and things were going good and we got somewhat intimate over the past 2 weeks. I hadn’t seen her for a couple of days and so our only communication was through text. I set up date with her over text in which she agreed but on the day due to certain circumstances we cancelled. I said it was fine and she texted back she was stressed because of work in which I made no effort to respond to was that was 3 days ago. Was this the wrong move and if so how do I proceed?

  42. Scott on June 7, 2013

    Hey Nick

    I’ve knew this girl in highschool and just a month ago starting talking to her. Usually we would text a fair amount back and forth. I’ve hung out with her a couple times, and the last time even got a kiss. But a day after that, she suddenly stopped texting me so much. I figure its because she was busy, but I made the mistake of possibly texting her too much and now I’m afraid I may have pushed her away. I just texted her an apology about my amount of texting and said I wouldn’t so frequently (which I plan on following through). I don’t know what to do though, how do I get things back on track?


  43. mike on June 9, 2013

    Hey man , so ended up meeting a girl online , usually I move right I’m no problem but this one seems a bit different , ended up texting back and forth a lot talking daily , she came to ky house I cooked and we drank a bottle of wine watched a movie I got drunk and fell asleep with my head in her lap , the next day I spoke with her in the morning she was headed out to a friends party , texted me while a bit buzzed told her have fun and be safe sarcasm is a tool I use with women, I mentioned I was extremely busy if she got drunk and needed a ride , she later called and asked if I was mad and then texted me when she got home , I’m thinking I’m overthinking but I’m also thinking she likes me especially after the hug and kiss on the cheek after date one and see her still online were we met

  44. shy guy on June 11, 2013

    I knew this girl through a mutual friend few months ago and we hung out as a group once. Afterwards she joined my school, making me her senior by a year. She started texting me a lot, we talked about silly stuff. She seemed rather excited when she sees me in school and said my name out loud when she saw me. Over these past few months, I kinda realized that I just might have fallen for her. The texting has continued, she sometimes stops it and then suddenly continues again after a while. I kinda did the wrong thing by texting her again after a while when it was me who texted her last, a few more times than she suddenly continues our convo, I even asked her once why she was ignoring me which was kinda stupid and she said sorry. Whenever she sees me, she smiles a lot which might just be cause shes nice. Im not sure whether she has liked or still likes me, when she sees me in school she does ask me to reply her texts, but she kinda no longer says my name out when she sees me. Right now, she stopped texting again and im not planning to text her again soon. From your experience, what do you think of my situation? Are we just friends?Pls help me

  45. John smith on June 11, 2013

    Well I’ve been text messaging this girl for about a month and a half all day everyday we hungout once and I can tell she really likes me. She’s never had a real boyfriend she had a man who stuck in there with her for about 9 months then dumped her for another girl. She never was in a real relationship but I can tell she likes me a lot and she tells me she does and hopes that it could work out in the future for us. Only problem is is that she told me she wasn’t looking for an actual relationship right now and doesn’t like to title things but she says she’s not looking for anyone better than me and she really cares about me. I ask her to hangout but she always says maybe or I might be able to and it doesn’t work out so I got mad at her about it and she kept explaining to me that she’s rly busy with school she likes me but she’s just too busy. She only tried making up the day to hangout one time and I couldn’t bc I was busy.. She tells me she really does like me but idk what to do here

    • Lamar D. on July 8, 2013

      Nick may say different, but i’d say talk to other girls too and see who is out there. sounds to me like she likes you but really may be busy with school. but on the flip side! see if she was in school and busy during those 9 months the guy stuck it out with her. I recently faced a situation where a girl I really had like told me I was too nice to her and I never hurt her and that she was afraid to give me a chance because SHE might break my heart, so after 3 months of going to dinner like twice a week and buying her grocery….. and underwear, I told her blank range, okay we can be friends but that’s it for hanging out! found out through another friend she was with some guy that miss treated her but gave her money… I met him too but I had nothing to say at all.

  46. Davo on June 12, 2013

    Hey Nick,

    I see u give good advice and I rate I could use some. I’ve hooked up with this girl who is in the same social group of old school friends but she goes to Uni far away. There are 2 weeks till she gets back for holidays and I’ve been talking to her on and off. She regards me as her holiday fling and says she is excited she gets to see me soon. Sometimes I see she has read my messages bt she takes ages to reply. Any advice to keep the conversation over text alive and get her even more excited to get home?

  47. Mathew on June 13, 2013

    Hi, I’m in year 11 and I like a girl that is in year 10. We talk every now and then. Whenever the convo ends she says ” talk to you later ” but then she never messages me. Like I always have to start the conversation. Can you help me try and hang out with her ? Like how do I ask her to hang out ? What do we do when we hang out ?

  48. Jim on June 25, 2013

    I need your help, this girl and I are giving it a try to see if we can ne more then friends, we have same set of friends, I need help texting and making her my own.

  49. bob 122 on July 1, 2013

    i met this girl in the bus we start charting but after two week i decide to tell her i love but she replied that she has a boyfriend but i decide not to text her .That girl stay at bording school so when she was at school i send her a card best wishes for his exams .When she finish the school she text me that she got my card but know she doesnt want to reply my message .What can i do to solve this mess .

  50. Steven on July 6, 2013

    Hey Nick!

    A few weeks back I was introduced by someone who I used to work with (who’s female and real close friend.. Like a sister to me) who I’ve basically fallen for as she’s cute and has a LOT of similar interests as me. Anyways through various means we have each others numbers now (a group of us are going to a music festival soon and she added my number due to a whatsapp group we made for the festival) the last few days we’ve been texting one another. She had a tough time recently and seems pretty low with her self esteem for herself and I have been complimenting her just to kinda build her confidence up abit.. Anyways just want your views on that should I hold out until this festival (2 weeks away – about 5-6 of us as a group going including her) or would it be wise to initiate a meet up of sorts just beforehand? I’m a bit worried that if it doesn’t work out it could complicate things not only with us but also the rest of the group of friends going to the festival.. thanks!

  51. Lamar D. on July 7, 2013

    there’s this girl that I’ve met through some classes we’ve taken together, she asked me for my number, I gave it to her and for the last 2 months we would hug when we see each other and talk for a few minutes. but today make about 3 months since I known her and I usually go to see her at the class she teach at and I got too busy, she text me and ask if I was there (because I didn’t have her number)I said yes and who is this? when she told me it was her my heart skipped a beat! that was around 4pm now it 10pm when just got done texting. do you think she likes, likes me and because she didn’t see me today that the text was a last resort to hear from me? or do you feel its just a friendship? I like her but I don’t want to rush her or make her feel weird. oh in the text we talked about our day and what was good and not so good about it, but she would reply within 3 minutes of me sending it to her. and she sent me some smiley face too. can you help please

  52. Jack on July 11, 2013


    I met this girl around 5 months ago at a church function and was drawn to her instantly. When we first met she seemed over the top in how kind and interested she was in me but I chalked it up for her just being a super nice person. I have been interested in her since tbut have really tried to be patient allowing things to devolpe without forcing them too. I recently starting taking to her more attempting to show interest while trying to avoid the texting game because I have allowed texting to often become something it isn’t and destroy potential relationships. About a week ago she texted me following a water tubbing thing we went too about how sore she was following up a conversation we had face to face and that text turned into a werk long back a forth text conversation. She asked lots of questions about me which I can only assume was her trying to figure me out. She even left for a vacation infor 4 days and sent me pics of her sightings so I thought it would be funny to send her boring pics of our home and she liked it. The conversation continued yesterday and it ended with me sending the last message. It’s been almost 24 hours and no response. She works two jobs and isn’t really a tech savy person according to herself so I’m trying not to over think this silence but it is really messing with my head. I’m not amazing at reading signals but she seemed into me via her text. I’m not sure if I should text her back with something funny or I should just ask her out next time I see her. Thanks in advanced for your help!

  53. RB on July 13, 2013

    hey nick
    ok theres this girl i like. thing is she’s my best friend’s girlfriend’s best friend. but we both live in different countries. i recently started chatting with her. how do i get to keep her interested in me by just texting. i know the odds are really shitty for me, but i dont wanna give up. help please

  54. Jake on July 14, 2013

    Hey Nick,

    I met this beautiful girl at my aunt’s wedding and we hit it off perfect. I would notice she would sometimes stare at me and turn away when I look. Got the courage and asked for her number. I have never been too good at texting girls. I always make them lose interest in me and I am not a good conversation starter. Can you give me some tips and advice?

  55. Ryan on August 5, 2013

    Hey nick,
    I met this girl we’ve been going out for a few weeks, she initially first started initiating texts then that faded off and it was always me initiating the texts. She went on a trip recently she text me the first few days she was there then I gave her space waited 4 days before I text her to ask how things were going she ignored my message so I waited 3 more days ended up sending another text she replied instantly. She got back from her trip I asked how it was didnt get a response then the next day she finally replied with 3 words not much of a response but she responded. Now I’ve backed off a bit and she actually initiated the other day so I waited a bit then responded we chat for a few hours. Now she did something for me so I said well how about I repay you with dinner since I told her a few days ago I would already take her out for dinner all she said was that would be nice not yes not no. So I tried in a text saying ill repay you with dinner she kinda changed the subject and said you can repay me with a cup of tea so now what do I do I want to take her for dinner but it seems like she rejected it? Or do I try again? Also is it good to stop a texting convo before she does?

  56. shyguysalwaysloose on August 12, 2013

    Kind of corny that I’m hear but i feel I’m in a lil trouble lol..well i meet a beautiful girl this weekend, caught her attention with a booty bump she responded that i scared her which i totally did wanna do but i instantly made her smile i don’t remember her name because i was drinking that night but i remember what she looks like well she was out with her mom which i immediately introduced myself and her talked for about 10-15mins an i got her number before she left sailing away like a princess on a carriage lol where the i go from here,seems like we made a connection i made her smile but who am i to no..any advice would be very appreciated

    • shyguysalwaysloose on August 12, 2013

      (She responded i scared her which i totally didn’t wanna do)

  57. Begginer on August 18, 2013

    Hey nick i seen that your helping people out and i was wondering if you can help me ok this might be long but bear with me.

    Ok im still young im 16 and shes 14 about to be 15 and have a quince (mexican party dance) and well i really want to be the main dancer that dances with her and well ive talked over summer for about 2 moths and she was happy and replied fast but im not sure if im friend zones i never went to emotional with her just helped her out with some problems with a guy shes interested for example
    Her: i really like him and he likes me back but im not sure im ready to go back in a realtionship
    Me: well its up to you its your choice your life yor future if you think hes the ine then go ahed but if not then dont, dont just let a guy think he likes you simple to just go inside your pants

    And well she was giving me hints after 2 weeks like “then again im single” and other lines like that letting me know that she was single and interested and well ive never really hanged out wih her shes just seen me after school like walking home And now about 1 weeks before school started i started alking to her and well it was good and normal conversations but im no so sure if she is iterested in me i txt her and well we reply to each other in about 2-4 mintues apart each time i try to keeo the conversation going but it just end sin like
    Her: oh haha lol
    Me: yeah ik haha

    Then i have to start and talk about something else and she keeps it goig for 4 replies and then just ends about the same i mean i make her laugh at times but not all the times and i also have only 1 class and its the last class of the day with her and well today is sunday and well i found iut were she lives by walking to school and seeing her come out of er house but she walked with her best friend and not me because i think she didnt see me and well now that i told her
    Me: hah its funny how you didnt want me to know were you live but i found out the other day before school
    Her: lol yeah and well i always walk alone and that was my friend manny and you should pick me up
    Me: haha alright ill pick you up and text you before i leave

    So now i get to pick her up walking to school and its only a 7 mintue walk so not thAt long and well today i was talking to her we were talking fine and out of nowere she stopped texting me and she hadent read the message yet its been 30 mities and she didnt goto sleep beause i told her friend
    Me: 🙁
    Friend: whats wrong
    Me: she fell asleep
    Friend: nope shes still up

    And i went in her ask and surely she was uo she answered a question 7 minutes after her friend replied
    So i just said “wow if only she really knew how i felt about her and to see if it would chanhe her mind at all”

    And well before i even saidthat i talked to her friend and her friend said that she said i was cute and that she would go out with me but it doesnt look like it by text so idk since she didnt reply and once she doesnt reply i dont say anythig and send like 4 texts i dont want to look desperate

    Do you think shes interested?

    Should i keep chasing her and see?

    Does she even actually think im cute or did she just say that?

    Should i give up?

    What should i do to make her interested in me in about 1-2 weeks of time?

    Also since im walking her to school now and in mondt will be my first day walking her should ido anything special?

    What should we talk about while walking?

    Im out of things to say by text?

    Weve never talked on ohone just texted?

    I really like her alot and want her to be mine any ideas?

  58. Big T on August 21, 2013

    Hey nick man. What’s good bro? So I met this girl on Facebook from a few friends and within about 4-5 hours of talking litterly straight through the night, I’d gotten her number and a few pictures worthy of a censor. I consider myself a reincarnation of Niel Patrick Harris as Barnie from “How I Met Your mother” and all my friends go to me for lady advice so this is an odd instance as I’m the one asking. So I’ve been texting this girl and we met up at this festival. We met up and started talking. It’s easy to note I’m much less aggressive irl than online. She gave me a really tight hug and we talked a bit. She was working there and I was keeping her company. Anyways I had run into a few friends and started talking to them and her boss flipped out on me and kicked me out for ‘crowding his workspace’. She thinks he just uses her as eye candy. Anyways, I motioned to her that I was going to walk away with my friends till she was done, but I think subconsciously at the time she took it as a metaphorical abandoning. After I went to go talk to her again she said she was helping her friend later that night so we’d meet up sometime in the week. Of course another tight hug. Note that while working we were sitting next to each other and about five minutes prior to being kicked out I had been moving my hand from her knee up and she scooted her chair even closer to mine. So I texted her the next day and ever since her replies have started to become shorter. I asked her if she wanted to go to the movies but she said that she was with her friend Danielle whom I feel is purposely cock blocking me. Apparently today, this girl (the one I’m interested in) had a huge migraine I wasn’t aware of and that was why she hasn’t responded to my multiple texts. I can’t believe I fell for the old head game of over texting but it happened. So time to recover. But anyways she had her friend text me that she had a huge migraine and that she was going to text me tommorow. I’ve written a give or take 5 sentence ‘short and sweet’ apology as to respond to her friends comment on me texting too much which I am almost positive was verbatim from my girls mouth. It defies the light talk rule, but I’m going to reimburse my offer on a seeing a movie together if she isn’t too busy. Something about this girl makes all my smooth talking womanizing skills vanish. Well by the time you read this ill have made my moves, but give me your opinion on future moves and your take on this girl. – The Big T

  59. Steve on August 29, 2013

    Hey nick. I found your tips awesome so I thought that you could help me.
    so there is this girl that I met about a month ago and we were seeing each other almost every night. we were also chatting over Facebook every day. So I found out that she liked me and since I liked her too I called her and described my feelings. She told me that she liked me too but the day after I would go on holidays for a while and we agreed to go out together after the holidays. The vacation lasted about two weeks.(I am now at the end of it. Tomorrow I am returning.) At first we were chatting every day. She initiated half of the conversations she was talking nice to me etc. But as the days went on the conversations felt more and more boring because we had not much to talk about since we had not seen each other for a long time. There were two days which we did not chat and when we did in some cases she sounded nice and sweet but in some she sounded boring. So the thing is does she still likes me or the long period of time was too much for her. I really need your opinion and thanks for reading this…

  60. Ted on September 13, 2013

    Last night, this girl and I really hit it off well at a party. After talking for awhile mostly with her and her friend occasionally she wanted to take pictures of us on my phone, then I asked her to kiss me on the cheek on one picture which almost always works 🙂 I was just honest with her the whole time, telling her how beautiful she was and how nice she was. After awhile I told her I wanted to take her on a surprise date next friday (a week away) which girls seem to love as well. She responded with “I have a boyfriend.” (first time she told me) BUT then she said she really wanted to go on the date with me still because I think she was excited about the surprise part. And I of course told her it would be exciting and adventurous. Haha it was perfect. She then proceeded to enter her phone number into my phone because (what I thought to be obviously reasons) of wanting to go on the date. She also started following herself on instagram from my phone. But anyway we decided to leave the party we were at and head to another party, so we left with my friend and her other beautiful friend to go to a party that they knew about. On the way to the party, it was only us talking and *flirting i.e. holding hands, putting my arm around her because it was cold, and even romantic little kisses on the lips, no making out though, least I don’t remember making out. Our other two friends were talking by themselves about 50 ft away. I just kept being honest with her telling her about what I want to do in life i.e travel the world and take pictures, and I don’t want to be stuck with a boring life with a 9-5 job. She kept telling me how much she liked my dreams about future life. We even stopped and admired these rock towers for awhile and just seemed to experience a deep moment together from the beautiful sight. We finally got to the party after about 20 minutes of walking. I helped her get up some steep stairs by holding her hand. And the rest is pretty foggy from here on out. I think we drank more at the house, and then maybe kissed a few more times, met her friends and new people. It was a good time. My guy friend and I didn’t stay long, I didn’t make a move to ask her to come home or anything like that, because I wasn’t getting the right vibes of asking her back home, so I didn’t. We definitely left with hugging each other. That was 24 hours ago. I’ve added her on facebook since and that’s it, and she hasn’t added me back. What is my next step from here on out?? I am so confused, it is a weird situation I am in. May I add she is absolutely gorgeous and my first emotional reaction is I really like her.

  61. Ahmed on September 19, 2013

    Hey nick,what’s the best way to approach a random pretty girl?

  62. henry on October 6, 2013

    hey nick,
    I hope you can help me out with this buddy.
    there’s a girl in my college whom I like. she was in a relationship with a guy whom she broke up with. she considers me to be her good friend. But eventually, I realised that she can’t overcome her ex boyfriend, she still loves him and she says she’s gonna wait for him. I’m really upset about this.

    and as per to our chat, she texts well and fine, but the problem is she volunteerily never starts a conversation and it’s always me. And when I text her, she take time to reply and goes away without informing and next time pick up the conversation where we drop the previous time.

    she totally trusts me and texts me openly without hesitation. she seem to be lonely. I donno what to do.?

  63. Tyler on October 16, 2013

    I’ve known this girl for 2 years, and we finally went on a date about 3 weeks ago. We both enjoyed it, and kissed multiple times. She told me that she’s liked me since we met, and I told her I felt the same. A few days later, I asked her if we were a thing, and she replied with “I don’t know”. I aksed if she wanted to be, and she said yes, but not now (she broke up with her last bf and I guess she’s still not ready). We were about to talk about our relationship status when we saw eachother last week, but a few of our friends came and interrupted our conversation, and we haven’t said a thing about it since. Should I keep pressing the isssue of a relationship, or just let it go?

  64. I'm not telling on October 24, 2013

    Great article! You have so much common sense and logic, well balanced with feeling and values… it’s a beautiful thing. I have something to add regarding texting. I agree, texting is here to stay, it seems to be the new norm; however, when a guy calls me – CALLS ME! – I love it. And, I’m an introvert and don’t generally like talking on the phone. But, the fact the he called, instantly turns me on, it’s like he put in some effort, pulled up his big boy pants, pushed past his comfort zone, and took a risk. HUGE turn on. Now, most men, text. This is fine. I agree with everything you’ve said. Most importantly, texting should be to move things forward, maybe get to know eachother a bit, and set up a date. Don’t text me every day for weeks before asking me out. I’m babbling. The thing I wanted to add was this: seem interested in getting to know me. There is nothing more irritating than a guy who cannot hold a conversation in text messaging. I’ll ask a question, he responds. Then…. nothing. Throw the question back at me, ask me a new question….something. Now, if I don’t respond, eventually the guys will think of something to say… but, now I’m disappointed. oh, and haha, I had to laugh at your grammar points. I’m 31, it’s a turn off when men text like teenage girls.

  65. Atif on November 6, 2013

    Dear nick,

    Iam in love with my friend.
    I dont usually hang around with her but we text all day.
    We only chat actually.
    We are in such a relation from almost 3 years.
    And i don’t know that does she feel same for me as i feel. Should i propose her? Plz help me out

  66. rebel on November 15, 2013

    Hey I was just wondering what you thought of my situation. I really like this girl and we hung out a lot within a week and I took her out on a nice birthday date. Things couldn’t have gone better. We constantly talked and had great conversations. Walking home she held my arm and hand for a lil too so I’m pretty sure she liked me. She then went home for a weekend and didn’t text me much which was fine. Then when she got back she said she was really sick and had the flu. A friend saw her the other day and she seemed fine. Also invited her to a party the other night and no responce so I was just confused on where I went wrong. I did not over contact her because I was very specific about not doing that. Please let me know what u think

  67. Kevin on November 29, 2013

    Dear Nick

    I’ve tried to find something useful from your other answers, but my question is a little different. I saw this girl at the Club in my city and told my friend that i thought she looked cute. Before i knew of it, he and his girlfriend WHO knows this girl, have tried to set me up with her. My friend’s girlfriend showed her a Picture and talked about me, and gave me her number. They expected me to create a connection out of nowhere, which i found a little awkward, but i’ve got trough that. According to previous posts, texting should not be overdone and the purpose should be to set up meetings.

    But the problem is.. She lives approximately 35 miles away, i know very little about her, and i cant really allow myself to setup a date where i would need to take the train in order to meet her. In my thoughts, that sounds way too eager and desperate, having in mind that we have only had 3 or 4 conversations during the last 10 days. She seems like a very nice girl and i would like to have a chance to get to know her, before i kill it over text messages 🙁 Im having following questions. How often should i text her? (i text her every second or third day.) I was hoping to let our friends arrange someting where we both could join, so i had a excuse to meet up with her. but it seems difficult the Next few weeks. Should i keep the contact on the low, or during this “waiting” time, do the opposite to keep the connection? It is usually me that starts the conversation, but she is replying with good answers and questions aswell, and shows interest. I just cant help it but im feeling like im overtexting if i ask a lot of questions and if i am the one to start the conversation, but is that just normal guy-to-girl texting? Im just afraid that i might screw it up, because im not a particular good texter. (I suppose the questions is because of the fact that we dont know anything about eachother)

    I apologize for any grammar mistakes.
    Any advice would be appreciated

    Sincerely Kevin

  68. john adams on December 1, 2013

    Ive been texting this girl who I really like, she would put 4 maybe 5 x’s per text , I met her last week and she seemed to be flirting with me a bit and we had a nice time, but when I texted her again she only texted with one or two x’s and slightly shorter answers but the conversation got slightly more personal. Im not sure whether she likes me anymore, responses would be great. Thanks

  69. Marshall on January 12, 2014

    Hey Nick,

    Should I contact an attractive women I meant off online dating? We meant at a sports bar for a drink and lunch. The conversation was a little stale and there was definitely some awkward silences but I feel like that’s expected on the first meet. She seemed a little rushed to get out of there though..

    About and hour after the date I texted her “Thanks for coming out, I enjoyed meeting you!” She replied with an “Thanks, I enjoyed meeting you as well.”

    Should I call or Text her tomorrow asking for a second chance?
    I was thinking “Would you be up for some bowling action on Tuesday night?” I feel like an active date will flow a little better for us. (I do think she’s slightly out my league, but fuck it!)

    I’m 30 but new to dating, I’ve kinda been wrapped up in snowboarding and my career for the last decade, zero experience with women. Sucks man!

  70. love learner on January 19, 2014

    I got a girl on Facebook.I really like her very much..i am always thinking abt her all day..I send her messages…but all one sided from response from her…for new year she wished me.. that was the only time i got reponse from her for all the messages i sent for 3 months.otherwise i am the one who send her messages..i sent her a friend request but she didnt accept it.If she didnt like me she would have told me not to disturb her anymore right?but she sees my msg and never replies back..How to make her reply back to me..I really would like to marry her..she is a girl of my type…

  71. chika on January 28, 2014

    hey nick, met this really beautiful girl and would love to be more than ”just friends” with her and dont want to be bugging her with calls either since she’s very beautiful so guys should be calling her frequently….wanna be kinda different, can you kindly suggest some text i can be sending her?

  72. jay on January 31, 2014

    Hey, I’m in high school. I just met this girl I’d see her around the halls, and we started talking a bit and we are texting back and forth. I think she is amazing, and way out of my league. Even tho a lot of girls at my school like me. I have my eye on her. I’m not the richest guy, or smartest guy but I’m a very good soccer player haha
    She used to play soccer a couple years ago but she’s a varsity cheerleader at my school now. I want to date her but I don’t know how to get past the friendly texts. I’d love to take her out or something but I don’t know what to do. I don’t have a car. Or parents to drive me. I don’t want to seem too unfortunate for her to think I’m not dateable. If that makes sense. Any advice?

  73. Rob on February 16, 2014

    Hi Nick,

    I have known this girl since last summer, and we both go to the same College. In the summer we got chatting and when we went back after the break we really got on quite well. We don’t really talk as much as we’d like but text instead. When I asked her out at Christmas, she said other boys had given her a “hard time”. Then a couple of days later, she told me she liked someone else and she could never love me. As soon as we went back after the Christmas holidays, she kept looking at me like she was sorry and she was giving off all the sings that she did like me. She even said “a new year, a new start”, which made me question whether that text was from the heart… On Valentines ( a few days ago) sent her a message after we went home telling her that I should have asked her to be my valentine (she said nobody loved her during the day because nobody wanted to be her valentines). I said it was the biggest mistake of her life, and then I told her bluntly that I loved her. She doesn’t believe me, and she said that we/she doesn’t know me well enough… Should I ask her out on a date through text? Because we both have a week off now and we wont see each other (otherwise) until next week.. I’m sorry about it being my life story but it’s rather complicated!

  74. Chris on February 23, 2014

    Hi nick,

    I’ve been talking to this girl from my home town for the last few weeks through texts. I got her number the same night I met her and conversation goes well, if anything she takes an amount of time to reply, ranging from a couple of minutes to an hour. Despite this she seems receptive to our conversations and after reading a few things on your blog, I can add in a few things to make them better.

    The issue is I’m currently living 2.5 hours away from her and before recently she was in our home town 4 hours away, so meeting up with her hasn’t been the easiest thing to do. But with her being closer and starting university I want to go see her in a few weeks (About 3 as i have unavoidable plans until then) after she has settled in. Is this the right way to go about this? Or is it too much of a risk of waiting almost a month before being able to see her again? Should something be said about how I feel about her or even that I want to see her in a few weeks?

  75. Chris on February 23, 2014

    Hi nick,

    I’ve been talking to this girl from my home town for the last few weeks through texts. I got her number the same night I met her and conversation goes well, if anything she takes an amount of time to reply, ranging from a couple of minutes to an hour. Despite this she seems receptive to our conversations and after reading a few things on your blog, I can add in a few things to make them better.

    The issue is I’m currently living 2.5 hours away from her and before recently she was in our home town 4 hours away, so meeting up with her hasn’t been the easiest thing to do. But with her being closer and starting university I want to go see her in a few weeks (About 3 as i have unavoidable plans until then) after she has settled in. Is this the right way to go about this? Or is it too much of a risk of waiting almost a month before being able to see her again? Should something be said about how I feel about her or even that I want to see her in a few weeks?

  76. Ryan on March 12, 2014

    I really need your help. I have been dating this girl for 7 months now but I want to end it. It is not fair to her because I keep thinking of this other girl I have liked for a while. I was in this girls class in fourth grade. We hung out at a friends house together a lot, and we even played the flute together. We stopped talking after that as we grew up, and weren’t in the same classes, etc. now it is 8 years later, and I think it is time to tell her how I feel. We are both seniors now. I first recognized it was her about a year and half-2 years ago while we were in the auditorium at an assembly. She was sitting directly in front of me and she looked familiar. I found out it was her. And remembered how I always like her. Anyways about a year or two have gone by since I remembered her and I like her more and more. I always saw her in the hallway with her curly hair and short frilly dresses. She didn’t really remember me or notice me. Well I finally Facebook messaged her. This was last July. We had a short convo though. All I really said was hey, you were in so and so’s class in fourth grade right? And you used to play the flute? And she just said yes, you were in my class right? And then the convo kind of stopped. I never made an effort to talk to her again. This year came around, senior year. And she is in my gym class. I haven’t talked to her once. We talked for maybe 3 seconds, when we were playing volleyball and she complimented me saying good job serving… And also we were in the classroom for health and every time she walks in the room she looks down at herself as if she is checking herself to see if she looks good… And I think I noticed her looking at me a couple of times? Do you think she likes me? What should I do? I don’t think I will be at school for the rest of the year until graduation, so I won’t be able to see her. What do I do. Can I just start talking to her over Facebook? Please help.

  77. The Aussie Dude on April 2, 2014

    Really like this girl in school, but I don’t know if she likes me. Never really showed any signs she likes me, and I don’t just want to come up and say “You doing anything Friday night?” How should I get to know her better, and eventually build up the courage to ask her out?

  78. raj on April 19, 2014

    Hey nick,there is this girl from whom I got a text two days back and I got to know by a friend of mine that she likes me first she started the conversation and the next day i did and we had some Normal talks but then the next day I didn’t text her neither did do you think I should be starting the conversation or wait for her to text me ? Also how should I talk such that I get to know her better and extend talks?

  79. Dennis on April 22, 2014

    Stop fuckin playing games!!! GO for your target, be a dick, be confident, be calm aye but not dry, be yourself most important!!!!! But yes you should remember some stuff, but not too much, come on bro’s be yourself!! Are you confident when you stress about every fuckin detail??? No, and that is the most important, altough you dont have to be a douche. Every situation and girl is different, so you cant stay everything the same. I wish you all and myself goodluck.

  80. justin on April 23, 2014

    what do you do if you are texting a girl and she just stops replying and you try to snapchat her and she just stops replying to that too and you been talking for 2 weeks iv asked her to hang out a few times this week but she says she has something going on already and she cant every time iv tried i need your help should i just move on or not if not what do i text her or say to her i really llike her im 17 and shes 17 to i just dont know what to do honestly

  81. Tyson on June 3, 2014

    Hey Nick,
    There’s this girl that I have liked for a while, when we talk it’s often smiles and laughs, and we flirt a good bit. But often times when I go to talk to her she turns her head as if she doesnt want to talk to me. I took this as a sign that she wasnt really into me so after a while i just accepted the fact that we would be good friends. That was several weeks ago, we had been normal and everything was fine. Yesterday i was particularly bored so I shot a teasing message at her about how she would be seeing some more of a boy she didnt like too much and i just poked a little fun at her for that, and soon she was responding very well to my messages and teasing texts were sent back and forth for a while with a few smiley faces. She was responding unlike ways she had previously responded via text and I was wondering if she was interested in me. I want to dig a little deeper by texting her today but i dont want to come off to her as if I was too interested by texting two days in a row when the last time i texted her was a week before that. What to do next?

  82. Mark on October 5, 2014


    I’ve been chatting with this girl on messenger. Towards the end of our last conversation, I felt like I was asking all the questions. I left the conversation with her answering my last question cause I felt like I was asking too many questions. Did I do the right thing? Should I have ended the conversation with a response?

  83. d00d on October 29, 2014

    Yo Nick,

    I’m in college and there’s this girl who’s just joined. We talk all the time on facebook and snapchat and all that, not as much in real life though. All that’s fine because the texting is going well, she starts it sometimes, all the good signs are there. However…recently she’s been helping me try and score with this other girl who only joined for a week then left. Now that she’s gone, how do I start winning this girl? Am I in the friend zone because she helped me get with another girl? Idk how to start flirting with her since we’re pretty close now!

  84. Matt on October 29, 2014

    Nick. Great read mate. Just a bit of advice needed if that’s ok. I’m still only young and I’ve just got out of a 6 year relationship. I’ve very recently just met this young lass I like. She’s stunning. I’ve pretty much done the steps you advise, I’ve sent a few messages and then arranged a meet. She said yes, then she changed her mind and said no she had other things to do, then she changed it again and said yes she will do, then she said she was nervous, then asked to leave it a few more days. Complicated woman, but she’s great to talk to. How can I make her comfortable with meeting me? She’s just got out of a relationship where she’s been abused and forced to have an abortion, that might put some blokes off, but not me, I’m the complete opposite to what her ex was. I’m respectful of women and would never hurt or be unfaithful. My question is, how would you handle this? We’ve spoken for about a week, I’ve asked to meet, her response changed from yes to no, yes to no. What next? Cheers mate.

  85. Matt on October 29, 2014

    Nick. Great read mate. Just a bit of advice needed if that’s ok. I’m still only young and I’ve just got out of a 6 year relationship. I’ve very recently just met this young lass I like. She’s stunning. I’ve pretty much done the steps you advise, I’ve sent a few messages and then arranged a meet. She said yes, then she changed her mind and said no she had other things to do, then she changed it again and said yes she will do, then she said she was nervous, then asked to leave it a few more days. Complicated woman, but she’s great to talk to. How can I make her comfortable with meeting me? She’s just got out of a relationship where she’s been abused and forced to have an abortion, that might put some blokes off, but not me, I’m the complete opposite to what her ex was. I’m respectful of women and would never hurt or be unfaithful. My question is, how would you handle this? We’ve spoken for about a week, I’ve asked to meet, her response changed from yes to no, yes to no. What next? Cheers mate.

  86. Ben Smith on October 29, 2014

    I’ve known this girl for three years and we’ve become pretty good friends. I like talking to her when we’re hanging out, texting I’m not good at when I text her. We just don’t click. I think she’s out of my league but I still like her, and wanna ask her out. But, if she says no I don’t want to change our friendship, which it probably will. That happened with one of my friends last year with her. When we text she either doesn’t answer or just takes a lot of time to respond. If any one has any advice please.

  87. Logan on November 9, 2014

    I know this post is old and I dint know if you still respond to it, but I need some advice.
    So a girl a know one day out of the blue randomly Texted me, we have been texting the past week or so and our conversations are for the most part fine. What I’m concerned about is most of the time I start the conversations. She shows sigbs that she is intrested in me but sometimes I feel like she is just “going along with it”. I’m not obsessive with texts, I just am concerned I’m going down a dead end. Please respond and if you need more details and or you don’t understand something, just ask.

  88. Mike on November 10, 2014

    Hey Nick…thes this girl i have known for years…actuatualy we started a university degree together but that time i couldnt think i would fall in love wuth her one day. But after 6 years knowing each other, ofcourse we talked to each other regulary, i started to develop strong feelings about her. Infact that happened when we discovered that we were both leaving for our post grad degree in the same foreign country. I started to invite her for a date so that i could tell her about my feelings and she didnt have a broblem with it. From that time tension began between the two of us but we sometimes keep calling and chating. What concernes me now is the tension and the fact that sometimes she cant return my texts and calls claiming to be having lot of pressure with her school work, although myself i dont want to put pressure on her but instead i support her on that. Recently, she even told me that she plans to visit my city during the oncomming winter break holidays. So, how can i found out if she’s interested in me or if she’s totally not have any feeling for me? I am really confused Nick, please give me an advise.

  89. John on November 13, 2014

    Hey Nick. A friend of mine gave my number to his girlfriends friend and she has been texting me almost daily for about a month. all we really say is “hey whats up” and then talk about what has happened in our day. sometime she starts up a conversation and sometimes I do. but the conversations are very limited and repeat a lot. What else could I say/ask her? also she lives about 3 hours away so meeting up isn’t really an option. if anyone has any advice that would be great. thanks 🙂

  90. Nick Ross on November 13, 2014

    I haven’t had any classes with this girl in 2 years so I haven’t really talked to her at all. I used to be a very good and close friend of hers before the 2 years. We kind of have an awkward relationship where I haven’t talked to her in a while and she hasn’t talked to me either. I have a class with her now so what should I do and how should I approach and talk to her?

  91. Sam on November 21, 2014

    Hey Nick, I now daily go on a walk in the evening with my friend. Now I am seeing a girl everyday, I think I am falling for her. Me and that girl had an eye-contact for like 4-5 times. I don’t know if she’s interested in me or not. I am scared to approach and talk as she comes on the walk with her mom. What shall I do? Should I wave to her or something? I have now really started liking her. Please reply for suggestion. Thankyou.

  92. Jeff on November 24, 2014

    Been on a few dates with this girl, we text regularly but I work a full time job and we both go to school full time so our conversations are usually not that lengthy. I recently just took her to New Orleans for a weekend with my fraternities fall formal vacation. She’s not 21 yet and I am but she has a fake ID so she wasn’t holding anyone back. We had a great time the first night we talking and dancing and it was just a good night. Then the next day we all went to a late lunch when the check came, she offered to pay for her own lunch because “she felt bad I was paying for everything” which in my experience is not a good sign. I was a lil taken back but I ignored it and convinced myself I was over thinking it. So we finish up at lunch and go sightseeing and have a few drinks and dance and such things seem to be going well. She then begins ignoring me and running off with my friends and GFs which I’m glad she was making friends but this continued on to the next day and She said lil to nothing to me on the ride home, then when we finally arrived instead of letting me drive her home she had called a friend in advance to pick her up. And has been very short with me since. I haven’t been harassing her or anything but I’m having no luck trying to figure out What happened. I guess my question is how should I approach this or if I’m just overthinking the whole situation.

  93. Leroy on December 1, 2014

    Hey Nick,
    I just read your article and it’s very good. Here’s my situation, I hope you can help me out. I met this girl in my math class in college, she absolutely amazing. I’ve always been shy with girls, but with her it’s different. Okay when I met she was going out with a guy who was at basic at the time. So I didn’t purse to be more than just friends. But about a little more than a month ago, he broke up with her. She told the day he returned from basic, he broke up with her through text. So since then I have been debating on whether I should go for her. So I’ve started texting her, but I always text her first. I asked her to go out for lunch like 2 weeks ago and she said yes. But she told me just as friends, she said because she had just got out of a 3 year relationship. But when we see each other in school, she sits next to me and we talk about anything and laugh the whole time. It’s truly amazing, but how do I make her more interested in me? What do you advice I should do? I’ve fallen for this girl, and I’m scared that she doesn’t like me and I’ve just got my hopes up for nothing. I’m in need of your advice, please help.

  94. Daniel on December 6, 2014

    Hey Nick, your advice is great and I hope you can help me or guide me on the right path. I met this girl at a school function party last week, talked briefly, then split mutually to be with other friends. Later that night I worked up the courage to get her number, quickly, but I got it. Now, I texted her about 2-3 days after and instantly received dry text with no context to go off of. Whats more confusing is she responded within a minute or less at times, throughout the whole convo. At moments questions were asked towards myself but for the majority of the brief texting convo, i was trying to skillfully pull the convo. Her last message was, ” haha nice” , nothing to go off of, especially based on her previous messages impression on me. She wasn’t dry and was semi talkative in person, which is why I was surprised, also due to her quick response pattern. PLEASE give me some advice. What do I do, how to I get this girl?

  95. Daniel on December 6, 2014

    At this point, getting girls numbers are useless to me because i always f it up with my texting skills

  96. Alfonso on January 3, 2015

    I currently got into a small arguement with my girlfriend but I want to tell her how I feel through a text, she doesn’t want to hear me in person so should I tell her how I feel ?

  97. Wesley on January 4, 2015

    Hello nick, I’d love your guidance!!
    I met this girl in pub, she causualy walked over and started talking to me, we got along fine. The next week she was out again, we said hello thenI stood away from her at the other end of the bar, she slowly drifted beside me where we spoke for the rest of the night. The next week she asked me to add her on Facebook, where we would send messages back and forth til 4am!! The conversations are never dry, we talknow about anything and almost everything!! So I made the move and asked her if she wanted to hang out in town to indulge in the festivities. She said that she would think about it and see if she has any money left over from Christmas shopping, even though I offered to pay. I left it for a few days but we continued talking as normal. mentioned that maybe the date was too soon in the friendship and she agreed and replied with “I really like you, but trying to work out if I like more than a friend. I’m new to the whole dating thing (she’s 19) and it freaks me out, but we do get along really well. I just need to work things out for myself before I further complicate things” – Where do I go from here Nick, I’ve tried being forward and assertive but she seems stubborn and nieve. I feel like we are good friends now, but I like her more than that and she hasn’t figured it out… Thanks for reading!

  98. Clark on January 13, 2015

    Hi mate. When i was five years old i had a cute class mate,she was in that time overweight, i like her anyway but you know that time, you know friends joking about that, besides i moved to another school. She just show up by chance in my facebook twenty three years later

  99. Clark on January 13, 2015

    Hi mate. When i was five years old i had a cute class mate,she was in that time overweight, i like her anyway but you know that time, you know friends joking about that, besides i moved to another school. She now just show up by chance in my facebook twenty three years later! and she is gorgeous. We went on a kind of date last weekend and felt in love wit her, but now i dont know how to make her see it isn’t just a coincidence, that i dont want be that friend from the school, I really like her

  100. Victor Kenway on January 13, 2015

    This girl is my friend, we always hang out together. Everyone says we should date. We are really alike, there’s never a dull moment between us. One day she texted me and said that everyone had been saying I liked her. She asked if it was true I answered yes and she got mad. She ignored me for a full month but now we are talking again. I try not to annoy her so I only text her like 2 times a week. Apparently after we argued she put some boundrys on our friendship. She says we can’t even hug anymore. It’s really hard, what should I do

  101. jeff gotham on January 15, 2015

    hey nick, i actually have a questiong regarding a girl im interested in at times we talk alot about almost eveything i really like her and we hung out several times during christmass break and the week after it even got to the point where she messaged me first all the time and now for some reason nothing at all and hardly responds to my texts why would this be? sorry about the hey jeff reading my name made me type jeff lol also this girl a year ago about told me shed date me im a nice guy but shes too scared to date anyone and the other day dating in general came up and she doesnt date because shes too nervous or something like that would asking her to the dance be okay and does it make sence for girls to randomly stop talking to someone like this

  102. jason on January 15, 2015

    Hi Nick, I met a girl via Asian friend chat app, we hit it off great she told me she was interested and was getting out of a bad situation, text flew back and forth she even sent sexy pictures of herself to tease me.
    she went back to her city which she had asked when she is single how often could I come to meet her.
    Now I over text her it’s been days since she responded back to me I want to keep her interested and meet with her, how can I fix it when we both expressed we are very interested in each other.
    She is in her 3rd yr nursing I know could be very busy as start of semester, but how can I get her to respond now I’ve tried everything from long message to short hey wonder how you are doing, has she lost interest and if so how can I win her interest back or was she just playing with me?
    Please help I haven’t felt connection like this in awhile wr hit it off great. And expressed deep interest with each other please email me and help me I’d like a chance to show her I’m a great guy.

  103. Denver on January 21, 2015

    Nick dude me and girl have been talking for a few days and like were both excited at texting each other but today she didnt have the excitment. Should give her space and stuff. I mean i walk her to class and we always hug at the end of the day. I dont want to lose her early what should i do?

    • Nick Notas on January 22, 2015

      It may have been that you didn’t push forward quick enough. If she’s texting you excitedly, walking with you to class, and hugging you — she was likely interested. Strike when the iron is hot.

      I would invite her to do something 1-on-1 outside of school. If she accepts, I would treat it like a date — flirt with her, create physical contact, and if you’re both having a good time, kiss her.

  104. Cameron Alexander on February 2, 2015

    Hey nick I’m in high school and I like this girl. We talk a little bit in school, but not a lot. I am too shy to ask for her number, but she has a good personality and I want to get to know her. Any tips?

  105. Brandon on February 4, 2015


    If the girl is too many people flirt her, should I keep going with her? Cause I really can’t understand which guy he truly like, keep making me curious that make me want to give up with it. But every times Decided to give up, she make something make me fell I i still got chance as tag me for something and something else. Should I give up this relationship ? Sorry about my freaking English haha.

  106. Randy orten on February 8, 2015

    If i talked to a girl yesterday and i didnt today what should i do to start a conversation?

  107. mike on February 9, 2015

    I recently met this girl online. We hung out and she’s great . We text all day and I was just wondering is that to much. What if we run out of stuff to talk about because we talk so much or she gets bored. How much is to much texting. I feel like this is where I always screw relationships up

  108. Juls on February 12, 2015


    I’ve gone on three awesome dates (one date per week) with a girl but she goes on vacation for 2 weeks and I’m worried about losing momentum. Should I setup a date before she goes or after? Thanks!!


  109. Nick on February 13, 2015


    I met a girl at a club we exchanged numbers and we went on a date next weekend. We really hit it off went out for drinks then went clubbing which we had alot of fun and she came over we slept together( no sex). Next morning i had to go to work till 12pm so she stayed at mine wait for me then we went for lunch and we organised to go universal studio. Mind you I haven’t slept for 24 hours so I was in a tired mode. Anyways after we seperate this was on sunday. I texted her on wed saying Hows her week been? From my girl friends i waited too long to text i may have send a signal to her not interested but I like her I didnt want to text her too early.
    What would you do? I was thinking of sending a apology text saying I didnt meant to wait for that long and seem that I am playing mind games with her. Please help

  110. Alex on February 17, 2015

    Hi Nick,
    I came across your article by chance while searching for something to advice me on some perplexing things with regard to my recent correspondence with a girl. Here as follows:

    After having looked at her profile and contents she has been posting on Facebook, I became attracted and wanted to know about her. So, I took the initiative to invite her, which she accepted right in one or two days interval. I asked a few questions, such as where she is living currently, and her profession, etc. She replied positively though her response is measured, mean always short. Yes, No, this, or that (no more explanation). On my side, I do not have a habit of responding to people that was as I thought it is somehow luck of respect or interest in the other people. Despite that, we kept exchanging. In the first week, we were chatting non-stop from the evening to near mid-night. And one or two days, during working day for both of us, we were chatting non-stop during the day. She was responding quickly and so did I. She asked me a profile photo. I sent her and asked her if she can do the same. She did even if she took some days. We had two very short voice conversation. During the second conversation, I told her about my intention for a long term relationship and sked her if she we can keep this intention in our thought as we move forward. But I felt that things froze at one point when she asked me if I have children. I did say yes but am single and they are not with me.She said she doesn’t want someone with children. Well, the fact is, even if I have, they will not be with me in my future relationship. Well, the conversation was over shortly after. Then, shortly after, I texted her, thanking her and explaining a little more how the (children) point will have little to no impact in my future relationship (I am honest about that) and asked her if we can think about it. She replied “Ok we will see that”. Since that day, we still exchange by text but her response is slow and yesterday she didn’t reply in the evening, the first since we start chatting. Today, she relied asking how I am doing. I responded as fine and proposed her if we can make extended voice conversation (well, to make things clear to me). I don’t know yet if (or what) she will be responding.

    I have the impression that she is a kind of girl with qualities I was looking for but am now troubled that the “children” case might be turning her off. What do you think about all these and what advice would you provide me with.

    Again, thank you for your help.

  111. Jordan on February 18, 2015

    Hey nick the girl i want to move forward with just got out of a bad relationship. I started talking to her and trying to make her feel better and after talking for like two or three days I asked her to go out to eat and and said yes. She picked me up cuz my cars messed up and we talked from 9:30 to like 1:00 in the morning and we laughed and talked and had fun. A couple days pass and we’re talking everyday and I just found out she’s going on a date again tonight did I do good of what. Is she just trying to keep her options open. Idk what’s happening.

  112. William on February 20, 2015

    Hey Nick… i’ve met this girl 2 weeks ago. She started to talk to me while we were both shopping at the mall. I’ve met her again outside and we took the same subway to go back home. I got her number, sent her a text the very next day and we went out for lunch together. I guess she wanted to know me. Because in her eyes i’m a complete stranger. The problem is that i had to leave town for 3 weeks for work the day after. So i’ve sent her a text while i’m here and she replied but to be honest with you i don’t know how to keep her interest alive from here by sending text messages. Plus i don’t want to give her that kind of feeling that i’m thinking about her all the time. So now i haven’t contact her for 6 days…
    What do u suggest me to do? Thank you for any kind of help


  113. Tim on March 1, 2015

    There’s this girl that I really like. So she introduced herself to me first and after 3 or 4 days of knowing her I told her that u that she was really cute and nice and she said “thanks and I think you are funny and cute too” so then I got her number. She always texts me first but always randomly stops texting me in the middle of the conversation usually after a 1 hour or so. Then she does that again the next day. She has been doing this since I got her number. Please help I really like her.

    • Tim on March 1, 2015

      And also she told me this when I asked her who she likes and she said “I like this senior but it doesn’t matter anyways”

    • demaurea123 on July 16, 2015

      Hey nick there this girl i like and we been going for 8 months now that know she gets mad after she down bein horny wat do i do next

  114. KWAKU on March 1, 2015

    HI NICK,there is this girl in my locality which has accepted my proposal but now telling my best friends that i am young because we are at the same level an now hanging out with my friend but i love her so what should i do?

  115. rahul on March 11, 2015

    Hi nick,I trust you, Plese tell me i aproached my classmate for friendship & she accepted me and many times she stares at me like as crush on me and i also like her but when i asked her out,she avoid me and does not text me back .what does it mean ,she is not intrested in me or other reason .

  116. James k on March 13, 2015

    Hey Nick, I need some advice. I see you get a lot of questions so I’ll make it short. There’s this girl I like and I’ve been texting for about two weeks and she used to text me first a lot but now it’s usually me starting the convo. I think I overtexted her. I see her every weekend and she has a boyfriend but he’s about to move far away so they’ll break up. She gets kind of irritated when I try flirting with her because she has a boyfriend. Do I keep texting her every other day or something? Or just not text her until she breaks up?

  117. isma on April 6, 2015

    Hey thanx for the article, there is this girl i love so much,we sometimes hung out together over the weekends but when i tried to let her know how i felt about her, she told me that she loves me but we can’t date.
    what do i do now?pliz help me

  118. Zaw Lwin on April 6, 2015

    Hi Nick
    I’ve had a crush on this girl and we became good friends but i don’t know how to ask her.Can you help me please?

  119. Zach M on April 8, 2015

    Hey Nick, I have this girl in one of my class and one day I finally grew the balls to talk to her and exchanged numbers. The texting is good but we don’t really have an opportunity to talk during the entire day. She texts really good but the replies are slowing down, and I think its because we don’t really talk face to face. I think it would be awkward if I just find out her classes and walk with her, and I have no idea how it would go if i just ask to hang with her. Its been about a week since we started texting, and it could be a 50/50 that shes interested.

  120. Mo Haroon on April 11, 2015

    Hey Nick,

    I’m 16 and really fancy this girl who is 15 (one school year younger than me) and i have never talked to her in person but we say “hi” and “how are you?” in the corridor. We have been talking on Facebook for about two months just saying “how are u” and wat u doin?”. We haven’t really got off to a long conversation about anything. I wanted to ask you whether i should ask her out on Facebook and see what she says or should I go up to her and talk to her in person and then ask her out. And what should I talk talk about to prolong our conversations on Facebook? And how should start the conversation with her in person as I have never talked to her in person before? And finally how should I ask her out.

  121. Ben on April 28, 2015

    Hey Nick! I’ve read a few of your articles and think they are great!
    I too have a question(s) regarding a girl I recently starting texting.
    First off, I have never met her in person. I guiltily met her on a dating web site. After emails back and forth for about 2 days she gave me her number to start texting her instead. It started out great. She called me handsome, asked for a picture of me to put in my contact info. in her phone and we connected really well. I am aware that she has never had a boyfriend and she seems a bit self-conscious. I am a texter who likes to put a lot into one text. However, she has a very hard time giving me anything to reply to. This makes me feel like she isn’t interested. . . . But she has told me several times how much she looks forward to seeing me? (btw, her and I will be seeing each other in person 3 days from today) I am always trying to send her silly texts and ask her more on things she starts to talk about. For instance, she said she was cooking chicken and sent me a picture of it. I replied “YUM! That looks so good! You must really like to cook huh? What kind of chicken is it?” and she replies with a “yeah it was really good.” I was expecting more out of her response based off of my emotional response and questions. I can’t tell of I am doing something wrong . . . and she always has me text first. I know that drives every guy crazy. But my BIG question for you is:
    “What if I asked her that we text less during the time we don’t see each other in person? Because I definitely feel like we text so much in one day to where she is already becoming bored of me . . . I just don’t want her to think that if I do ask this question, she will assume that I am showing signs of losing interest . . . when really, I would much rather wait until we are face-to-face and talk. I generally am not a fan of texting. The lack of nonverbal communications kills me. I am an emotional guy and I would much rather share them personally with her than through emoticons. It’s hard for girls to understand that though. Especially when you just met them.

  122. Jim on June 4, 2015

    Hi nick
    I am talking to this girl that I like on and off for a long time now but most of the time the conversation seem to go no where. I have know her for about 5 years now but I am quite shy when it comes to starting a new conversation. Once a conversation starts going I am fine but I don’t know how to start and what is too forward like asking her what she’s up to.

  123. seeker on July 15, 2015

    sup Nick. i met this girl in a taxi, we sat closed to each other and we got talking. Ask her some few questions and she responded well. I finally asked her number before I alighted and she gave, she even said i should give her mine which i did and she saved it in my presence. We said bye to each other. I later called in the evening and she sounded nice, i compliment her and she loved it. what bothers me is, she has never for once replied any of my text, but when I do called she would say thanks i saw your message. I like talking to her on phone and she does like it too. I don’t know if she has any interest in me cause she had not reply any of my text. what do you think?

  124. Ben S on July 25, 2015

    Hey Nick,
    There is a girl I like and I have recently been texting her to try to set up a date. The problem is, she’s been at a camp for the past week and I’m moving to a different state in a week. I know it’s last-minute trying to ask her out the week before I leave, but I really want the opportunity and she’s a really nice girl. I’m determined to ask her out via phone and not text. When I asked when a good time to call would be with her out of town at a camp and all, she said yeah she wanted to talk. When I sent some follow-up texts, she ignored them and hasn’t said anything for a few days now, even though I can see she’s been active on the app (Facebook Messenger). Anyway, what happened? And how can ask her out with the little time I have left?
    I’d be really grateful if you gave me some advice. This would be my first date ever.

  125. rahamat on September 9, 2015

    sup nick,some days ago I saw girl in way .and one day in Facebook I searched my friend of friends list and got this girl one of friend is mutual to her whom I saw in the way . I’m hurrying send friend request her but she do not accepted .another I gave massage to her saying your so pretty your I have never seen yet as you and she replied my massage said me thank you.after normally same days I talk to her normally with some impressive word and after some hour I didn’t found any impressive word and told her good bye .at another day in the morning I sent her massage saying good morning and she replied but I found that day she is not aggressive as first day .and so going on same hello , hi only what do I do please give some ideas

  126. Matt mcm on September 10, 2015

    I met this girl at a block party a few weeks ago. We set up a date the next day. It was perfect. I tested her for a few days after that and found out she was in one of my classes. I CANT TALK TO HER AT SCHOOL! I can’t make conversation. Our second date was awkward and I feel like she is slipping away. I don’t want that. Pleas help! How can I strengthen our bond again?

  127. Clive on September 16, 2015

    Hi I’ve been friends with this girl for a couple of years we have been flirting on and of would it be stupid to ask her what she looks for in a man?

  128. Max Setramus on September 23, 2015

    Hey nick. So I don’t know if this page applies to high school but I’m a junior. So I met this girl once at a track meet at her school. It’s like 30 minutes from where I live. And I recently got an Instagram so I somehow found her page and we had a short conversation that ended in me getting her number yesterday. Sept. 22. How soon should I text her back. I’ve heard the 3-day rule is not really true so what should I do? Thanks.

  129. Ahmed Hosney on October 10, 2015

    Dear Nick,
    there is this girl we’ve known each other for almost a month but just chatting for only about 2 weeks and she told me that she drinks and gets high so i was like “so lets pull a bong next tuesday” and replied with “i don’t get high with people i just met” what should i reply to her saying and i want to meet her up and go out to pull this bong and eventually i want her to be my girlfriend

  130. Mayur on October 10, 2015

    Hey Nick,
    I was in a relationship with a girl for two years. Then it didn’t workout but we were still good friends. Meanwhile my girlfriend’s best friend also had a breakup and we started interacting. She seemed quite interested in me. Then one day when we were high, we really got close and made out. She did not apologise or felt guilty about it. Then next day we went together after college, had a really nice time together holding each other’s hands. The next day my ex asked me to get in a relationship with her again out of nowhere. I felt bad for her but told her about my feelings for her friend. She asked me whether it was mutual and she was upset. When she had a talk with her best friend whether all this was correct or not, her best friend told me it is impossible for us to get in a relationship as it will ruin her friendship. Now her other friends are asking her to keep a distance from me and she is doing that at the moment. I really love this girl and she likes me too. I keep waiting for her texts only to feel dejected again. Kindly give some advise.
    Thanks buddy.

  131. James Scott on November 19, 2015

    Hey Nick I’m looking for some help, so I’ve been talking to this girl for about half a year on and off nothing to exstravigent however we were both flirting pretty heavily. So after we didn’t talk for about a month she got a boyfriend. We still kind of talked and she was still flirty around him with me. That ended up breaking up because he cheated, but right before that happened she invited me to go with her somewhere while we were there we talked hung out and such, she also brought up while we were there we should go grab some food so we did. Ever since then (the breakup) I find out text conversations short but it’s only been a week since the breakup. When should I just ask her on a date and how should I approach this. Plus does she even like me?

  132. Bence on December 3, 2015

    I’ve been studying a program time to time since I’ve been working a lot. And I met this girl off Tinder.

    I didn’t pay attention to her at first and she started to come back to me and trying to get in conversation with me. And then months go by we still talk and met. However I had a conversation with a buddy of mine.

    He says I’ve been talking too much too her (not necessarily) and says I should stop talking to her for a week. The reason why he mentioned was if I continue with talking to her etc, then I’m in the friendzone.

    I dont think so, since we made out on our first meet, she even openly told me that she is a virgin and other times she tells me that she wants me more than anyone else.

    Just want to get your point of view whether how long you should give a break to talk to a girl and why.

  133. Aaron on January 19, 2016

    Hey Nick,
    Before I begin with this scenario I have never been in a relationship before or have ever tried, In other words I don’t know what I am doing..
    So there is this girl that I met in my college chemistry lab class. She pointed out my awesome Zelda shirt and we really hit off conversation before class starts. Afterward I ask if we can hangout and she says sure. We talked for a good half hour before I had to go to class, we exchanged numbers and started texting each other and I found out that we were also in the same lecture class so I asked her if she wanted to hang before class and she said sure again, which made me ecstatic. We met up got coffee before class had another solid conversation and things were going good until as we were walking to chemistry class, this guy exchanged weird glances with her and I was confused. Then she told me that it was her exes best friend and they broke up a week ago. This made me more confused on how to handle things now. After class we talk a little more about her situation and she said that the break up was stupid and immature but she was still having problems. I do not know their intentions, how long the relationship was or how she feels about me entirely, but I want this work. I ask if she can hang sometime over the weekend and she said that she is going home for the weekend, That is fine and then in the middle of the day I decide to see how her weekend is going by texting her,” how is your weekend going?” Turns out that was not the smartest idea I could have made as several hours later she texted me back saying she is having more problems with her ex . I didn’t know what to do beside just feel sympathy about it and saying sorry you have to put up with this crap. She replies being very appreciating of my thought. I don’t know what the next step is and I need major help.

  134. siddharth Singh ranawat on February 7, 2016

    Hey nick I am chatting with a girl regularly but now she is not replying for no reason what to do now

  135. Danny on February 16, 2016

    Hello nick..
    Please I need your help,,there’s this girl who was giving me a green light, I knew she was into me and I was into her too, then when I first made the move she told she’s not ready for a relationship yet, and that we can be friends at the moment and that she’s kinda confused,. Although we do text normal and have normal conversation this few days I even went to the movies with her, please what do I do?

    • Stark on May 3, 2016

      my suggestion is you take things slow

  136. Stark on May 3, 2016

    Hey Nick,i have known this girl for a while now and we actually became friends always chatting with her on my phone until l realized i had feelings for her really deep feelings and i told her how i felt for her and she said “I’m sorry but i only like you as a friend” and i was like thanks for being honest with me and the next year i told her i was still crazy about her she still said no. Then i asked her out last December and she said her mom and older sis read it before her i said OK. Then after wards my sis told me she asked after me so what do i do about her because am not she likes me and am definitely not sure she doesn’t like me,so what do i do?

  137. phoenix on September 8, 2016

    hey. I’ve come to know this cute girl, who’s been through a bad relationship but now seems to recollecting herself. We’ve become friends but doesn’t seem much interested in taking things forward. It’s more like she’s holding herself back, thats what I feel. I would like to know how to text her to win her trust.

  138. Eric M on September 10, 2016

    I need help! I met this girl at school on the first day and on the first day she seemed really into me. She was always smiling at me, giving me high fives and talking to me and asking for help. On the second she asked me if I wanted to join her group for a group activity. Then on Thursday and Friday she barely talked to me so does that mean that she lost interest? I texted her but she continued the conversation once then only answered my question to what her background was then stopped talking to me what should I do

  139. Dylan on September 10, 2016

    There is this girl i used to go to primary school with where we both used to sing, although not together and we were never together in primary school.
    Anyway im a year older, shes bi and since i chatted to her once on the bus I text her that night and it ended up her asking for advice on how to end a relationship with a girl, so I gave her advice and now she has been hinting thats shes not with yer one anymore. I even asked later to confirm and she said that her relationship with her girlfriend had not been sorted. For the next 2 days ive been txtin her and on the second day i mentioned her tagging along as i was heading up her direction with my dog. We had a great conversation throughout the walk which turned out to bd very long. When we turned back and eventually reached her house i suggested that maybe next time we could meet up for a cycle although im not sure if she heard me or not because she had already started walking back in home. When I got home i txted her sayin i enjoyed the walk and would love to meet up again sometime although i got no reply until i sent another msg later asking which of her favourite games would she most recommend I download. I have no idea what to do now, I feel she might have shrugged me off and I dont know where to go from here. Any advice will be hugely appreciated and tks in advance 🙂

  140. Mike on November 18, 2016

    There’s this girl I wanna hit up she’s in my class. She called me on her phone to get info about a shoot we’re doing .. now that I have number is it bad to text?

  141. Darren on November 25, 2016

    Hey Nick.. i am a 17 year old and i have been texting a girl two times for the past three days. I plan to ask her out after the centralised high school exam which is going on right now.. and after three days it’ll be over. shud i ask her now and tell her to go out next Xday? Or shud i wait until the exam is over before i ask her out? If i wait will it take too long? And if i wait, should i text her everyday before i ask her out? Will i look desperate if i text her everyday? I think her responses are fine.. there are at least one emoticon per message, and she seems interested to tell me about her life and her replies are expanded and seeming to tell more than usual..any help would appreciated


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